--the fab intro-----------------------------------------------------------
what are you doing?
im printing this story.
a story? what is this for? is it homework?
well, no. its a magazine.
a magazine?
yeah, im printing articles from a magazine.
its not for homework?
no.
why?
because i want to read them.
stories?
well, not really: just this magazine.
youre not making any sense. you mean articles from a magazine?
yeah, thats what i said.
no, *I* said that.
i told you, articles from a magazine.
whatever, you can leave now.
fine.
--we lub tMM!--------------------------------------------------------------
s. .sP7s.
xxxxxxxxxxx xx xx xxxxxxx b xxxxxxxxxxx
::::::::::: : :: :::.ss ,gP :: ::::::: :
:::::::::: :: :: : g. ::::::::::::
:::: :::::: :: : :: :b ::: ::: :::
xxxxxxxxxxx 9bssd 9bssdP bssdP : xxxxxxxxxxx
ssss P tMM
y0lk 54: the schoolhouse r0x!
--welcome to y0lk 54!----------------------------------------------------
y0lk: getting more and more like dto every day. an introduction AND a header
by someone OTHER than the writer of this issue, no less!@. tommorow: the
world.
--hmm. whats on tv?-------------------------------------------------------
click
y0lk news.
alt.zines.y0lk - coming soon to a newserver near you. REALLY, TRULY. it may
be a newsgroup, even as you read this. leet, huh?
y0lk can still be begotten, not made, from ftp://ftp.etext.org/pub/Zines/y0lk
call my board: phantasy land. IT TRULY SUX. 201 SUX. EVERYONE SUX. phland
is *NOT*, if you were wondering, a zines bbs. it would be nice if it was,
but 201 sux0rz, as i said. my board gets 0 posts. but.. WE HAVE NET-SPIEL!@
call my board. now. 201/275.1403, maplewood, nj.
for the y0lk-chix: email phorce phorce@openix.com at phorce@ope... damn. i
gave it away. yeah, well, thats the address. im head samurai of y0lk now,
so you can discuss such matters with me, y0e.
also, for all you y0lk f4nz: the y0lk mailing list, which hooch has probably
already relentlessly plugged. the deal: email listserv@magsystems.com with
the line subscribe y0lk in the body of the message. its rad.
also in todays news: THE HENDERSONS ADOPT HARRY. film at eleven.
--ugh. change that channel, y0e.--------------------------------------------
click
y0lk award-show time!@
y0lk groupie award of the month goes to moft. you might see him in hack
with OPS, no less. he went into zines one day followed me and sub-
sequently got banned, kicked, and analraped by ores. having only read ONE
zine in his life, he graced zines with statements like this:
moft y0lk rools.
ores shaddap.
*** moft has been kicked out of zines by ores you tire me, pathetic man
ores *moft* your a lamur
*** Mode change +b *!*@*openix.com by ores
ores i crushed him like a fly. muhuhaha.
phorce HEY! THATS ALSO *MY* DOMAIN!
well, i probably didnt need to quote all of that. later, when moft was
unbanned, and moft had read the first lines of the gnu dto 8:
phorce so, howd you like dto, moft?
moft wow, dto is even better than y0lk.
*** moft has been kicked out of zines by ores im feeling angst-ful
for being such a selfish martyr in the face of many anti-y0lk advocates,
moft has been hereby awarded the y0lk groupie award for the month of april.
moft: accepting award thank you so much. i respect your skillz.
clap clap applause
--ack.----------------------------------------------------------------------
tv sux0rz. lemmie read something.
--sigh--------------------------------------------------------------------
chimps suck.
sitting in math class, this statement suddenly popped into my head.
chimps suck.
i look around the room. people are talking, jabbering to eachother.
they all look so content. stimulus, response. stimulus, response. like
cheeping monkeys.
do they even think? or does the speech come from a switch, turning
on and off somewhere in their nerve centers?
i stare, trying to search for some sign of humanity. anything i can
call unique.
i am only met with the face of a baboon staring back at me.
scared, i turn to other faces. searching, probing. i stare at one
face, and watch as it melts into that of a monkey. going through the whole
class, i am met with blank expressions and monkey screeches.
do we really think? or do we simply act? have we really come
that much farther up the evolutionary ladder? or are we fooling ourselves?
chris, why isnt your notebook open?
i stare at her. watching her face.
well?
umm.. i didnt think we had to take notes.
chris, cmon! start writing down examples!!
we just got our tests back. i aced it. i havent done any homework
since september. i havent studied since september. i usually do homework
at the beginning of the year, and then the teacher gets tired of checking
homework every day.
umm... okay.
i open my notebook.
good. now, you see, the square root of two times i...
i close my notebook.
class ends. the usual rush of children trying to leave class as
quickly as possible muffles her voice. shes talking to me, i notice.
chris - why didnt you have your notebook open? what happened?
i didnt think we had to write examples down.
well, you should have been checking your work...
i didnt have to!@ no one ELSE was writing down the stuff on the
board!@ and out of the entire class, you pick on ME?! i was sitting here,
and looking at the board, and you pick on me because my NOTEBOOK isnt open?!
i dont USUALLY write down your examples ANYWAY! whats wrong with you!?
she was trying to get in a few words while i said that.
well, chris, you just should have been...
i pack up and leave. i have to get to my next class, yknow. music
theory. an AP class, it is. interesting, too.
woah, chris - what was that?
what?
you going off on mrs. ayres.
i did?
yeah, you were just shouting at her.
i was?
yeah, whyd you do that? i would have just said okay.
didnt i?
no, you were all loud and you said why did you have to pick on ME
out of the WHOLE CLASS? and stuff.
really? oh, wow. okay. cya.
yeah, okay. cya.
wow. i was loud, or something. oh well. mrs. ayres dont like me
too much, i guess.
sigh.
fucking monkey.
--moof----------------------------------------------------------------------
welp, thats the end of my spasm. like the word? i picked it up from tal
meta. that tanj-boy is a great guy. read all the tanjs, while youre at
it. free advertising.
its in ftp://ftp.etext.org/pub/Zines/ThereAintNoJustice, i believe. you
might want to try ThereAintNoJustice instead no .
its really good.
I PH33R T4L M3T4. I PH33R T4NJ.
--put some sort of editors notes stuff here--------------------------------
huh? do i still do editors notes? what?
uhm! well, it was a good issue!!@ what do you want me to say?!@
i dunnooooo... i wish tal meta would write a y0lk. yessir!@ -creed
--index---------------------------------------------------------------------
.db.
title author
01 the other white meat creed
02 several k-leet hax0rs sittin around a campfire and groovin creed
03 nuclear weapons, global destruction, op wars. creed
04 a young man, an infant, a yak... all living in sin creed
05 household uses for afghanistanian food creed
06 pour cement down my anus hooch
07 hail santa! creed
08 hasidism and sysops - a pair for the nineties? hooch
09 lunchables rock. creed
10 t-shirts and toejam bedlam
11 nap-time - the dog prank - exclusive interview hooch
12 movie reviews showgirls!@ - win95 vs. os/2 sorta hooch
13 straight outta compton - dialchix - muh dawg!@ hooch
14 im a tall, goofy, dorky, chink phorce
15 bedazzled by the eliteness creed
16 how to blow your nuts out with cornstarch and orangina creed
17 i am a warez pup - who are you? hooch
18 lemmings phorce
19 the science of astrology belial
20 the notorious anticlimactic bastards of the zine scene cd/h0
21 dUcK 54uc3?!!? phorce
22 top 5000 reasons why i should kill myself creed
23 citrus fruits for sale phorce
24 group masturbation belial
25 ethereal experiences for perverted pyromaniacs creed
26 catering for the warez eleet phorce
27 brief mental pause belial
28 the army day camp belial
29 the geek theory, hickies, and another long day creed
30 nets, zines, and that chick from wings hooch
31 mentos! the freedom giver! mercuri
32 ramblings of a poseur bedlam
33 sitcoms, stereotypes, and satan creed
34 fuck you - a note to all yall on zines hooch
35 apples, oranges, and pears phorce
36 the little cultist that couldnt creed
37 careening through hyperspace at a slug-like rate creed
38 snowday phorce
39 creed is g0d creed
40 big hurt is ruler of the earth bighurt
41 dead people, nasty thoughts, and colored glue bighurt
42 bbs softwares/internet hooch
43 abandon thy gods! from yonder cometh y0lk! creed
44 mogels own very special personalized 1 y0lk issue phorce
45 your burro is no jackass! creed
46 rollerskates, indians, eagles and cougars creed
47 outer space, ice cream, streetcars and gophers creed
48 Evan the genius becomes enlightened and melts his face off creed
49 6 insignificant ziners in a bowling microcosm of life creed
50 the best of the worst creed
51 the prince of darkness versus some guy named dave trip
52 ode to my feet creed
53 hopelessly lost poots
54 the schoolhouse r0x! phorce
TT
--infoez---------------------------------------------------------------------
if you see your name on that chart, you are a y0lk member, whether you
like it or not. if you are a y0lk member, you have a y0lk member board, et
cetera.
hooch is the stupendous chief shephard of y0lk.
phorce is the head samurai of y0lk! beware!
mindcrime is an official y0lk member, cuz hes just so damn wacky-ass.
email phorce@openix.com for free mailsex.
what are you doing?
im printing this story.
a story? what is this for? is it homework?
well, no. its a magazine.
a magazine?
yeah, im printing articles from a magazine.
its not for homework?
no.
why?
because i want to read them.
stories?
well, not really: just this magazine.
youre not making any sense. you mean articles from a magazine?
yeah, thats what i said.
no, *I* said that.
i told you, articles from a magazine.
whatever, you can leave now.
fine.
--we lub tMM!--------------------------------------------------------------
s. .sP7s.
xxxxxxxxxxx xx xx xxxxxxx b xxxxxxxxxxx
::::::::::: : :: :::.ss ,gP :: ::::::: :
:::::::::: :: :: : g. ::::::::::::
:::: :::::: :: : :: :b ::: ::: :::
xxxxxxxxxxx 9bssd 9bssdP bssdP : xxxxxxxxxxx
ssss P tMM
y0lk 54: the schoolhouse r0x!
--welcome to y0lk 54!----------------------------------------------------
y0lk: getting more and more like dto every day. an introduction AND a header
by someone OTHER than the writer of this issue, no less!@. tommorow: the
world.
--hmm. whats on tv?-------------------------------------------------------
click
y0lk news.
alt.zines.y0lk - coming soon to a newserver near you. REALLY, TRULY. it may
be a newsgroup, even as you read this. leet, huh?
y0lk can still be begotten, not made, from ftp://ftp.etext.org/pub/Zines/y0lk
call my board: phantasy land. IT TRULY SUX. 201 SUX. EVERYONE SUX. phland
is *NOT*, if you were wondering, a zines bbs. it would be nice if it was,
but 201 sux0rz, as i said. my board gets 0 posts. but.. WE HAVE NET-SPIEL!@
call my board. now. 201/275.1403, maplewood, nj.
for the y0lk-chix: email phorce phorce@openix.com at phorce@ope... damn. i
gave it away. yeah, well, thats the address. im head samurai of y0lk now,
so you can discuss such matters with me, y0e.
also, for all you y0lk f4nz: the y0lk mailing list, which hooch has probably
already relentlessly plugged. the deal: email listserv@magsystems.com with
the line subscribe y0lk in the body of the message. its rad.
also in todays news: THE HENDERSONS ADOPT HARRY. film at eleven.
--ugh. change that channel, y0e.--------------------------------------------
click
y0lk award-show time!@
y0lk groupie award of the month goes to moft. you might see him in hack
with OPS, no less. he went into zines one day followed me and sub-
sequently got banned, kicked, and analraped by ores. having only read ONE
zine in his life, he graced zines with statements like this:
moft y0lk rools.
ores shaddap.
*** moft has been kicked out of zines by ores you tire me, pathetic man
ores *moft* your a lamur
*** Mode change +b *!*@*openix.com by ores
ores i crushed him like a fly. muhuhaha.
phorce HEY! THATS ALSO *MY* DOMAIN!
well, i probably didnt need to quote all of that. later, when moft was
unbanned, and moft had read the first lines of the gnu dto 8:
phorce so, howd you like dto, moft?
moft wow, dto is even better than y0lk.
*** moft has been kicked out of zines by ores im feeling angst-ful
for being such a selfish martyr in the face of many anti-y0lk advocates,
moft has been hereby awarded the y0lk groupie award for the month of april.
moft: accepting award thank you so much. i respect your skillz.
clap clap applause
--ack.----------------------------------------------------------------------
tv sux0rz. lemmie read something.
--sigh--------------------------------------------------------------------
chimps suck.
sitting in math class, this statement suddenly popped into my head.
chimps suck.
i look around the room. people are talking, jabbering to eachother.
they all look so content. stimulus, response. stimulus, response. like
cheeping monkeys.
do they even think? or does the speech come from a switch, turning
on and off somewhere in their nerve centers?
i stare, trying to search for some sign of humanity. anything i can
call unique.
i am only met with the face of a baboon staring back at me.
scared, i turn to other faces. searching, probing. i stare at one
face, and watch as it melts into that of a monkey. going through the whole
class, i am met with blank expressions and monkey screeches.
do we really think? or do we simply act? have we really come
that much farther up the evolutionary ladder? or are we fooling ourselves?
chris, why isnt your notebook open?
i stare at her. watching her face.
well?
umm.. i didnt think we had to take notes.
chris, cmon! start writing down examples!!
we just got our tests back. i aced it. i havent done any homework
since september. i havent studied since september. i usually do homework
at the beginning of the year, and then the teacher gets tired of checking
homework every day.
umm... okay.
i open my notebook.
good. now, you see, the square root of two times i...
i close my notebook.
class ends. the usual rush of children trying to leave class as
quickly as possible muffles her voice. shes talking to me, i notice.
chris - why didnt you have your notebook open? what happened?
i didnt think we had to write examples down.
well, you should have been checking your work...
i didnt have to!@ no one ELSE was writing down the stuff on the
board!@ and out of the entire class, you pick on ME?! i was sitting here,
and looking at the board, and you pick on me because my NOTEBOOK isnt open?!
i dont USUALLY write down your examples ANYWAY! whats wrong with you!?
she was trying to get in a few words while i said that.
well, chris, you just should have been...
i pack up and leave. i have to get to my next class, yknow. music
theory. an AP class, it is. interesting, too.
woah, chris - what was that?
what?
you going off on mrs. ayres.
i did?
yeah, you were just shouting at her.
i was?
yeah, whyd you do that? i would have just said okay.
didnt i?
no, you were all loud and you said why did you have to pick on ME
out of the WHOLE CLASS? and stuff.
really? oh, wow. okay. cya.
yeah, okay. cya.
wow. i was loud, or something. oh well. mrs. ayres dont like me
too much, i guess.
sigh.
fucking monkey.
--moof----------------------------------------------------------------------
welp, thats the end of my spasm. like the word? i picked it up from tal
meta. that tanj-boy is a great guy. read all the tanjs, while youre at
it. free advertising.
its in ftp://ftp.etext.org/pub/Zines/ThereAintNoJustice, i believe. you
might want to try ThereAintNoJustice instead no .
its really good.
I PH33R T4L M3T4. I PH33R T4NJ.
--put some sort of editors notes stuff here--------------------------------
huh? do i still do editors notes? what?
uhm! well, it was a good issue!!@ what do you want me to say?!@
i dunnooooo... i wish tal meta would write a y0lk. yessir!@ -creed
--index---------------------------------------------------------------------
.db.
title author
01 the other white meat creed
02 several k-leet hax0rs sittin around a campfire and groovin creed
03 nuclear weapons, global destruction, op wars. creed
04 a young man, an infant, a yak... all living in sin creed
05 household uses for afghanistanian food creed
06 pour cement down my anus hooch
07 hail santa! creed
08 hasidism and sysops - a pair for the nineties? hooch
09 lunchables rock. creed
10 t-shirts and toejam bedlam
11 nap-time - the dog prank - exclusive interview hooch
12 movie reviews showgirls!@ - win95 vs. os/2 sorta hooch
13 straight outta compton - dialchix - muh dawg!@ hooch
14 im a tall, goofy, dorky, chink phorce
15 bedazzled by the eliteness creed
16 how to blow your nuts out with cornstarch and orangina creed
17 i am a warez pup - who are you? hooch
18 lemmings phorce
19 the science of astrology belial
20 the notorious anticlimactic bastards of the zine scene cd/h0
21 dUcK 54uc3?!!? phorce
22 top 5000 reasons why i should kill myself creed
23 citrus fruits for sale phorce
24 group masturbation belial
25 ethereal experiences for perverted pyromaniacs creed
26 catering for the warez eleet phorce
27 brief mental pause belial
28 the army day camp belial
29 the geek theory, hickies, and another long day creed
30 nets, zines, and that chick from wings hooch
31 mentos! the freedom giver! mercuri
32 ramblings of a poseur bedlam
33 sitcoms, stereotypes, and satan creed
34 fuck you - a note to all yall on zines hooch
35 apples, oranges, and pears phorce
36 the little cultist that couldnt creed
37 careening through hyperspace at a slug-like rate creed
38 snowday phorce
39 creed is g0d creed
40 big hurt is ruler of the earth bighurt
41 dead people, nasty thoughts, and colored glue bighurt
42 bbs softwares/internet hooch
43 abandon thy gods! from yonder cometh y0lk! creed
44 mogels own very special personalized 1 y0lk issue phorce
45 your burro is no jackass! creed
46 rollerskates, indians, eagles and cougars creed
47 outer space, ice cream, streetcars and gophers creed
48 Evan the genius becomes enlightened and melts his face off creed
49 6 insignificant ziners in a bowling microcosm of life creed
50 the best of the worst creed
51 the prince of darkness versus some guy named dave trip
52 ode to my feet creed
53 hopelessly lost poots
54 the schoolhouse r0x! phorce
TT
--infoez---------------------------------------------------------------------
if you see your name on that chart, you are a y0lk member, whether you
like it or not. if you are a y0lk member, you have a y0lk member board, et
cetera.
hooch is the stupendous chief shephard of y0lk.
phorce is the head samurai of y0lk! beware!
mindcrime is an official y0lk member, cuz hes just so damn wacky-ass.
email phorce@openix.com for free mailsex.
log in to add a comment.