THE
blade .. drawin for the fun of it.
: :: t
he edge is a propaganda vehicle for the blade nation
welcome to our revolution
the edge -- the blade informational textfile - v
olume 4 / issue 5
: contents ::
the edge - volume 4 / issue 5
the blade nation - july 19
97
our affiliates - jul
y 1997
:were gunna light a fire so god dam
n big the godsll notice us again.:
its daylight now. you can put yer visor down.
T odays lesson: Never let a black man
and an alternateen collaborate on
an informational textfile. Theres just some t
hings that a group president
really has to do himself. So, without further lameness
, I present to you the
ramblings of Cappacino and Edicius, the idiots of the
month.
lenny dykstra aint got nuffin on us!
ok, so mindcrime and cappacino
fell asleep on mindcrimes floor,
so im going all nutty with this info file .
. yeah, boyee!!!!
i was listening to this daft punk album,
and its really good. and then
the batteries in cappacinos cd p
layer ran out. now im sitting on
this computer in silence, except for t
he tapping of the keyboard
and the hum of mindcrimes air condit
ioner .. its really cold. i wish
i had some extra batteries. extra batteries t
hat, by the way, were
sitting comfortably in cappacinos bag
--smart Edi... pure stealth.
in news completely devoid of useful inform
ation, the screaming
wontons is really inactive. i mean, we sti
ll play together. but the
organization of the league is all
gone. belial hasnt written a
newsletter in a few months. but, rest assured
, edicius is still number
one in the standings!
ok modem wa
rrior, youre probably getting
pretty bored right now .. but, i will bring back
the humor somewhere in this
file .
so im driving in the car with mi
ndcrime today .. and he says, im going to
see veruca salt when they come aroun
d here because those girls are pretty
hot. i bet i can find some young alternaslut
s at the show, too!
sicko!!!!
editors note: edicius like to personify himsel
f as other people.
hes actually the mindcrime in the above pass
age.
edicius
got a parking ticket in the
lovely town of keansburg, nj
. he was at a punk rock show, and some meter
maid-wannabe rent-a-cop gave him a ticket.
can you believe that?
the blade nation traced down the cop and beat the
living snot out of him with a sausage. once
he started screaming like a girl and calling for his
mom did we realize that the meter maid was none
other then our friend napalm.
rumors that im making up right now:
belial got hit by a car. but, because
hes so buff, he dented the car.
just like a moose or a deer. go belial
dimes fell asleep at the wheel a
nd did a 180 across the garden
state parkway into a crowd of nuns who were w
aiting for a bus to
philadelphia so that they could .. man, i
wish i was witty so i
could put something funny right here.
actually, if i was funny, id put something right
here.
actually, this whole thing woul
d have been funny!
* edi has no dope skills.
mindcrime gets all the girls because
hes the new lead singer of genesis
UPDATE: last month, the blade nation
claimed that we had aquired
and killed the spice girls. actually,
we killed them all except for
that blonde one. shes in edicius h
ouse, and gives him massive amounts
of crack and head. mindcrime
and cappacino kidnapped the black
one from edicius and took her out to d
inner, capps treat, cuz shes
kinda stealth and shes cute too.
aww, play that dope diggity rhyme.
thats your what-stick??
My fuck-stick. Mindcrime replied la
zily from the easy rocking of his
waterbed.
Err, yeah? well, um. what do you do with it?
Edicius returned, still
puzzled.
HE doesnt do anything with it. Cappacino spat for
th, not looking at all
in Edis direction, deeply into some lit-like crap he
was writing for The Edge.
Well, Edi said, feelings hurt from lack of attenti
on, What does IT do?
It fucks... dumbass. belial said from his not-so-c
omfortable position on
the workout bench.
Edi, still feeling as though he missed something in
the past few days he
did, began to ask again, erm, what?
Cappacino stood from the computer, but not before pr
essing Ctrl-S and turning the monitor off, turned to
wards Edi and said, Come on, lets go. And dont
forget the fuck-stick.
Edi stood, and then bent over to pick up the famed f
uck-stick, and proceeded
to follow Cappa to the answer he sought. He could hear
Belial saying to Mind-
crime before leaving, uhuhuhu, hes gonna show him ho
w the fuck-stick works.
So Cappa and Edi went downstairs and out the front d
oor to Cappas brand
spanking new old Buick Skylark Skywalker. They hop
ped in, and Cappa took
Edi to a place he knew there would be some cuties to t
ry out the new wicked
invention brought into existence by the BlackOps Intel
ligence Division, known
to you mortals by the common name of 7-eleven.
Cappacino, upon entering the famed 7-eleven, pointed
out a fine, young cutie hoochie to beta-test the F
S-2601 its model name on, and motioned for Ediciu
s to hand him the almighty contraption.
Capp pointed the stick at her, and said, excuse me
baby, I cant help but
notice your pain, share it with me... and then he hit
the little button on the bottom, causing it to flar
e out bright colors of all shades and hues at the
girl. Upon contact with the lights from the FS-2601, t
he girl fell softly to the ground and began havin
g an orgasm, completely by herself!
To say the least Edicius was amazed, and when Capp w
as finished with his astonishing demo, Edi want
ed immediately to go back to Mindcrimes house and
try it out on Mindcrimes sister trouble., which
wouldve caused problems.
Edi said to Cappacino, Woah.
Cappacino said to Edi, Pure stealth, right?
Edi said BACK to Cappacino, WOAH, now coming into
full realization of what
he just witnessed.
Cappacino laughed and said, Heh, and this is only a
taste of whats coming
from the BlackOps crew... phearit.
bass bass bass hi-hat keyboard keyboard bass bass
hi-hat snare
S o ..
Once, I was walking down the street, and I met him.
He was Dyslexia-Boy.
He was the superhero for all superhereos. I saw him
battle Evil himself
with only a fuzzy nufflestufflebat tm and a pair of
sissors. It was so
Macgyver-esque. He beat the crap out of Evil, and Evi
ls never shown his
face around here.
He saved an orphanage from closure by entering the b
ig race and winning the
500 needed to keep it open. Alvin and the Chipmunks
were so happy.
He got me tickets to the Genesis concert because he
saved Phil Collins
daughter from a big frozen watermelon. Then Phil Coll
ins left and I never got
to see them again, because the other two members didn
t like Dyslexia-Boy. But
thats another story.
.. anyway. His eventual downfall was the day I saw h
im running down the
street faster then a speeding bullet. No, his speed w
asnt the thing that
killed him. It was the fact that he couldnt read the
STOP sign, and he ran
right out into the intersection. Actually, he lept ov
er the 94 Pontiac
Sunfire, but got broadsided by a bus.
Too bad Dyslexia-Boy never got to read. Im really s
ure he could have made a fine squash player.
mother should I trust the government?
This month was a very busy month for the Blade Natio
n. We teamed up and
aquired a lot of, uh, junk.
Before we get to the long, unimportant small stuff,
I hearby claim the
numbers 69 which we stole from Acid, I think, 2601
*cough*, 2001 hey,
hal9000 loved it, why shouldnt we?, and 12 Todays
show was made possible
by the number twelve!.
Belial, Mindcrime, Dimes, and Edicius took a trip to
Seaside, New Jersey.
There, they met up with a lot of other modem warriors
and aquired the whole
fucking boardwalk, minus a dart game.
More specifically, shit we got from this trip includ
e:
- the Frog Bog stand.
- a bumpercar.
- a ticket booth.
- some 3D skateboarding game not 720, we already had
that.
- four air hockey tables, including a phearsome alumin
um top table note: this is the only aluminum top
air hockey table in the state of New Jersey
besides the one that was right next to it.
- the House of the Dead shooting game.
- some punk kids standing outside smoking pot.
- Ivan the Ironman Stewart, and two of his Super Off R
oad Games.
- Shoot the Geek.
- checkerboards from the shitty dart game.
- the Zipper and Gravitron rides.
- some vibrating game that Rattle showed us. no, not
that game!!!
- Antihero.
On another trip, Mindcrime and Belial went to a yard
sale. They got:
- a wooden chair, missing a leg.
- some silverware.
- an extra leg for a wooden chair.
- a seven year old girl. Belial picked her.
Edicius has a job at the Great Atlantic and Pacific
Foodstore. Hes aquired
a lot of stuff from there.
- a cute checkout girl named Courtney.
- Sarah.
- Michelle.
- fifty-two shopping carts with bad wheels.
- a can of bad tunafish.
- also noteworthy: using cleaning solutions found on a
isle 12, Edicius created a cure for Polio. Too b
ad Jonas Salk already did that.
Mindcrime, Belial, Edicius, and Cappacino took a tri
p to Point Plesant, New
New Jersey. After strolling the long, air hockey-less
boardwalk, we aquired:
- a really bad mini golf stand.
- another Super Off Road game.
- four San Francisco Rush games.
- six really angry skinheads.
- the slow batting cages note: Belial and Edicius w
ent a combined 0-20 in
the medium cage.
- A Boardwalk sign. if youre ever around Pt. Pleasan
t, look on the signs
that are actually on the boardwalk and youll see an
Owned by the Blade Nation sticker, I swear
Mindcrime and Edicius took one of our owned planes t
o Hong Kong. We
interrupted the cermony where Britain was giving Hong
Kong to China. We now
own Britain, Hong Kong, China, and Laos.
Grey Hawks in Ireland we own Air Lingus.
Belial owns his bed at 3:30 in the morning.
Grymmjack and Sara own a bunch of hippies at the Det
roit fireworks.
We own Microsoft Internet Explorer, but wer
e looking to trade for some
Nintendo games and some cheese.
Mindcrime, Buddy, and Jason own a drunk guy in Red B
ank to throw rocks at.
music we listened to while compiling this epic...
Wu-Tang Forever Wu-Tang one of the only rap grou
ps with skeeeeillz
The Greatest Hits Of Skaghetti and Meatballs
Summers in the Park Ska-Tune Network
Smokin Crack NebraSKA
Wendell Ska-Man and his Ska-t-Jamboree
Ska, Ska, Ska: Volume 1
Even More Ska, Ska, Ska: Volume 3
See Yah! b/w Agent 86 Inspecter 7 seven inch
Songs in the Key of S-K-A the Ska Files
CiA Members Cover Polka songs from 1972
movies we saw this month, but not around pack time,
so the pack wasnt
delayed because of them...
Men In Black and The Crow again, cuz Capp did
nt see it.
I form atomically, Socrates philosophi
es and hypotheses cant define it
why we droppin these mockeries, lyrically
perform armed robbery, flee wit
the lottery, possibly they spotted me...
-The most pheared Wu-Tang rhyme
leader of the revolution:
mindcrime ........................................
............ mci@blade.org
senior staff:
belial ...........................................
......... marc@netlabs.net
edicius ........................................
.......... edi@cybercomm.net
grymmjack ................................
................. grymmy@blade.org
division coordinators:
napalm death ...........................
....................... nd@blade.org
cappacino ................................
................ cappacino@lit.org
dark knight ..............................
................. darky@execpc.com
ravaged wanderer..........................
.................. rw@shocking.com
artistic visionaries:
black hazel ....................................
charr ..........................................
.......... charr@matches.com
chlorine .......................................
claypool .......................................
......... claypool@match.com
dead soul ........................................
dimes ............................................
.... sdiamond@skidmore.edu
elusive vision ...................................
..... elusvisn@pacbell.net
internal stalker .................................
julian .........................................
............. julian@itw.com
kiwi .............................................
kno-3 ..........................................
...... brunning@skidmore.edu
knocturnal .......................................
....... knocky77o@juno.com
kuma ...........................................
q ................................................
............ hu.86@osu.edu
liquid blue ......................................
.. blue@transmission23.com
lucifer ..........................................
..... lucifer@injersey.com
luke skywalker ...................................
........ lscodine@juno.com
mel farr suppastar ...............................
morose1 ........................................
............. gorkij@usa.net myn .....
phaelinx .......................................
.......... plinx@pacbell.com
paladin ..........................................
............ ben@vrone.net psychosis .
riddler ........................................
... survey2000@earthlink.net
sensei ...........................................
.... rformido@skidmore.edu
spoonz .........................................
string ...........................................
..... string@earthlink.net
the crowe ......................................
.............. crowe@lit.org
the mage .........................................
tonto ............................................
........ tonto@inetnow.net
torgo ............................................
...... torgo@geocities.com
toth .............................................
tron powerhouse ................................
........... tronepic@tir.com
zempf ............................................
......... zempf@modex.com
alumni:
counterpoint .....................................
darkman ..........................................
errant angel .....................................
facsimile ........................................
............ leemm@uci.edu flux ......
grey hawk ......................................
.......... grey@infi-pos.com
oxidizer .........................................
............ oxi@post1.com
soul seeker ......................................
.... soulman@cybercomm.net
tourian ..........................................
. tourian@angel.heaven.god
! - several people have been deleted from this l
ist due to inactivity.
this does not necassarily constitute removal fro
m the group.
! - artistic mediums have been delete
d from this list. all members of the
blade nation are artists of some form or another
and are free to
experiment outside any bounds of medium.
affiliated outposts
alderaan
908 mindcrime
: galactic temple
!abraxas 818
mHz
: north american
shrine
apocalypse 201
napalm :
eastern shrine
free coke 514
the night angel :
canadian shrine
prevail +46
rex :
swedish shrine
organized kaos +61
krisis
: australian shrine
email division -- addres
ansi -- a
nsi@blade.org
ascii -- a
scii@blade.org
music --
music@blade.org
high rez. --
vga@blade.org
writing --
lit@blade.org
world wide web http://
www.blade.org
file transfer temporarily do
wn
snail mail blade producti
ons
p.o. box 213
rumson, nj 07760
end of file mikey frooty. mhz is
god.