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y R O N E
Well here i am..yet another thrilling month of tyrone...the big black nigger magof the ascii scene. I apologize too everyone about the tardyness of this releasebut hey..quit your bitching..its done..no code..just straight text...kinda like
vaginaby kHz. This month is one our better months for the mag, we have alot
of articles for the mag..i didnt get enough art..but what i have works so im
not complaining.
In other news this month..Necromancer has a girlfriend now..and yes..hell HAS
frozen over. Secondly, two people join the staff as monthly reviewers for tyronethese people are, Pariahof Fire and The Prodigyof Odelay. Also next month
the mag will be taking on more drastic changes as of our next release..more
details too follow.
And last, but not least thanks too everyone who did art for me this month, this
people include, Meatpod, Pariah, Mass Murderer, and Black Jack. thanks guys
I LOVE YOU GUYS!
And now...drum roll On too the mag!
- this is empty. Peace.
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P, 1 Editorials 88
8@yy@h,7 2 Interview with
7h,7 Black JackRemorse @gyh Cains Monthly ,g Packreviews P
Homosexual Ascii yyy @8
Kwest Ascii P
odelay Ascii P .,
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7 Quotes . ,d, , A word from JND ,dh,
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- Writer Pariah
This is mainly in response to The Upright Mans, such an elite alias
I -had- to spell it out article in Tyrone 2. First off, Im really glad
Tyrone is in stable hands once more, no offense intended but things usually
work best when in the hands of the person/people that created them. Now,
onto the article..
For the most part I agree completely with what Tum said, except for
some things.. Myself being one of the few full fledged anscii artists who
currently draws Ive heard alot of the excuses as to why anscii sucks, but
with time most of them dissapate. A lot of the people that criticized my art
for its color have either viewed it without color and recognized that its
a regular high quality ascii without the shocking colors or else learned
to accept, even appreciate it. I think the same goes for a lot of new styles
or methods in the art scene. You can complain that people dont like your
style because it doesnt resemble the norm, but the bottom line is, if youre
actually talented in the long end, it might take a month or a year people
will learn to appreciate what you draw. This is in a great part thanks
to the artists that push the limits and try drawing something different
regardless of what the demand is currently, what people like changes every
minute. Dont get me wrong, EVERYONE, except maybe that pimply discyple is
going to get some negative feedback from certain people, but that always
happens, people have different opinions. The art scene and its styles are
really like the music industry and the people who buy music, being very
brief here, there are about 3-4 genres of music, and hundreds of small genres
that branch off of them, think of those 3-4 main genres as 3-4 different
opinions, and those hundreds of smaller genres as people who draw that certain
style or people who support/appreciate it. Unfortunately some people
disregard colored ascii because they a try it once and arent successful,
colored ascii, like any medium isnt something you can pick up after only one
try or b because they dont like change. And while I respect everyones
opinion, a and b are pretty pathetic reasons.. Ascii, referring to grey
non-colored art made up of the ascii set has a lot of legends or greats
that have added to the respect it gets, but anscii has the same, msd, kHz,
everyone pushing it currently, etc.. and deserves the respect ascii has
gotten from the majority of the scene. To briefly make my point here, ascii
and anscii are in a way two seperate mediums, and everyone should respect
them as such.. once you get shaping/your basic style down trying to learn how
to color should be recognized as a good idea, not a bad one. Nothing against
ascii artists at all, were all part of the ASCII scene, and shouldnt hold
grudges against each other based on whether were colored.. err.. whether we
color our dollars or not. Also, colored ascii isnt for everyone, some people
are good at pushing the limits of ascii, and some are good at pushing the
limits of anscii.. one way isnt better than the other, they both can produce
some very nice looking art when done well. The only reason the focus of this
article is on colored ascii is because its obviously less popular than ascii
is, and without a few influences could very well not exist, that would be a
shame.. good artists need to push anscii and realize some of its advantages.
And to all the people that are currently doing that, sadly, the only two I
know of are Neilprodigy, Julesmeatpod and myself I salute you..
I dream of a day when all ascii artists can hold hands and beautifully arrange dollar signs or other ascii characters regardless of color
-- The Reverend, Dr. Pariah King pariah@breaks.for.alienz.org
P.S : As to what Tum wrote concerning advertising personal styles, if you have
an original style advertising it is normal.. original styles can
gradually become the base for new artists to rise up. Adding things to
your style is always a good thing, but sometimes thats really hard to
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- Writer Pariah
I had to write a 6 page essay on the individual and the team effort, and it
got me thinking.. If you take a look at the scene, specifically the ascii scene
practically everyone whos good is in at least 2 groups. In some cases it might
be because they support the cause of both groups, but in most cases its becausethey want to get their art to as many people as they can I should know, I do
this. This might not be the case if the ascii scene, like the ansi scene, had
several quality groups instead of 3 or 4. Take me for example..
I officially got in the scene in the summer of 96 when I joined rune, plain,
blade and cia.
In the fall of 96 I joined s0ap, left for acid!a, dualed with noname to releasemy colored asciis and then left acid!a
In the winter of 96 I joined eclipse and went solo with the group for about 3
months.
In the beginning of 97 I was in noname, joined rile, was in eclipse2after
cheeze left, created fat972 with firestorm and hajiit lasted about a week,
became fire!a coordinator and went solo with fire for 2 months, and joined
odelay.
In the summer of 97 I left noname, left rile, left odelaywell, it died and
joined remorse I went solo with remorse for about 2 months too, then I became
a permanent guest in kwest, and re-joined odelay after neil revived it.
Well, currently Im only officially in 2 groups, which is better than when
I was in 4-5 but thats not the point. Each time I joined another group
while I was already in one it was because I thought that other group could offerme something that I didnt get from the first group.. be it a fun enviroment,
laid back attitude, more respect from other asciists, etc.. For example,
currently Im in remorsea close group of people that is as stable as it gets
and arguably the best and odelaya more laid back group of quality artists fullof new and old talent. Both of these groups give me everything I need, with
remorse theres the seriousness of competing and with odelay theres the fun
laid back almost eclipse-ish attitude. Does being in 2 groups rip apart the
idea of competition in the ascii scene? I dont think so.. Compare the ascii
scene to the ansi scene, the ansi scene has ice, fire, echo, twilight, glue,
everglo, dark, and aweto name a few. The ascii scene has remorse, odelay,
and kwestIm only naming serious groups that have been around more than 2
months. With only 3 groups in one scene its only natural that talented artistsare going to want to be part of all of them. The answer to this problem lies
not in going solo with one group against your will and missing out on what the
other groups have to offer but in creating more stable/fun groups. If the ascii
scene had 10-15 groups like the ansi scene dualing/tri-grouping would be less
of a problem, there would be one group that fits what each artists wants, be
it a laid back attitude, a serious attitude, or a humorous approach to
everything. The fuck you my groups better than yours attitude has its
disadvantages, the scene friends you associate with would be controlled by
what group youre in and ascii would become more of a war ground than a place
to talk about the latest releases and the such.. Lately everyone seems to be
focusing more on two things that Im not a big fan of:
1. Youre all shitfaces, my group is better than yours!@ This is just stupid, Id rather see unity in the ascii scene than everyone seperated by the
groups theyre affiliated with.
2. Everyones criticizing each other already.. people are using personal
conflicts they have with certain artists/group leaders as an excuse to
criticize other peoples art. If you dont like someone, fine, you probably
have a good reason, but criticizing their art is just pathetic. Anyone who
has run a group successfully has accomplished something that deserves the
respect of everyone.
Basically all Im saying is that people should stop complaining, things
are only as bad as you percieve them and by saying the ascii scene is dead
all you do is turn away more people from drawing ascii/starting what could be a
good group/etc..
-- Pariah
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The scene of the future - by sargon.
Throughout my long, 8 month stay in the scene, Ive come to the point where I
call myself a legend, although nobody else does.. which is REALLY strange,
considering Ive been around for 8 months. Thats a long time.
Anyways, throughout my arduous stay, Ive seen trends come and go. Ive got
some predictions for where the scene will be in 6 months, or so. Some of them
are serious, others maybe not as serious, you can figure it out.
First off, recently, the flow of good artists into the scene seems to be
slowing down, and the flow of foreigners will be unstoppable. When I ran
serial, I had 3-4 apps a day, and at least 2-3 of those apps came from
isreal, sweden, finland, or some other nordic country. Oddly enough, at least
2-3 apps a day got rejected. You do the math. Although I refuse to name
certain artists, you can figure out some of the people Im talking about.
They join mediocre groups, with styles that are either:
A horrible
B styleripped
C both
For some reason, the mediocre groups release their work. Eventually though,
these groups will smarten up, and all of the foreigners will be outcast as
losers and freaks. i.e: aphro. What happens when a bunch of losers and
freaks get rejected from the mainstream society? in this case, society is
the scene. They unite. Proletarian power! So, this leads to my first
prediction, which is that in 6 months or so, there will be many local
groups, for scenes such as the isreali, swedish, or finnish scene. The fact
that the groups are local is an excuse for the group to be shitty, but they
always have the excuse that theyre the best group in isreal.
cough*libido*cough.
My second prediction, which is a more serious one, comes from the recent
emergence of styles of such artists as the prodigy, tek, discyples inverse
style, mass murderer, and others. They all use characters other than the
dollar sign. I know there are other artists like this, I just cant think of
them. It seems that everythings been done with dollar signs that can, so one
of the easiest ways to be original is to use characters other than the
dollar signs. Although the current artists using those styles are generally
considered good, the number will grow and grow, due to the emphasis in the
scene on originality. So, in conclusion, I think people will start to move
away from the dollar sign, not abandon it, but there will be lots of people
using other characters.
This next prediction, started with some comments I heard another person make.
I think it was discyple. He said eventually, with the growth of the scene,
peoples ascii will all start to look the same. Right now, you can clearly
see certain styles that have been copied, and styleripped, look at 3/4 of the
isreali artists, they all draw with this certain newschool style, thats easy
to do. Basically, people will continue to perfect curving methods, and each
time somebody finds a better way to curve, or shape, people will adopt the
method into their own style. I dont know if it will generally start to
become where everyones style becomes the same, but Im pretty sure that
shaping, rounding, shading, and coloring methods will be VERY similar. Just
look at how many people in the scene RIGHT NOW, even some respected artists,
use msds coloring style.
Right now, thats about all I can think of. thanks for listening.
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The NON- Trend, written by Black Jack
Alright. At the moment, school has just started... September is just start-
ing, and the ascii scene has gone back to its timeless loop of boring doodle.
Or has it? .. As of the late, packs have been popping up with new shit in
them.. new characters instead of the mostly used . Not only this, but
artists that used to do , are switching over..
AND THIS IS FUCKING PISSING ME OFF.
Listen up fuckups.. that non- is old. You bastards are following artists
who have been original, and done stuff like that since the start ie.
prodigy, massmurderer, tek, haji, etc . This non- shit is/was in the
odelay pack 10, the remorse pack 15 and even in the last serial pack.
Whats with this? .. Have we all lost our self respect? .. Why is everyone
doing this non- shit, and changing their style to the line stuff? Just
because a couple artists start it up, doesnt mean you have to.
Right now, your probally defending your little non- shit. Saying its the
new wave of ascii, and the future. BULLSHIT. the lines dont shade well,
and over all, makes the asciis look worse. Or mabey your saying how that
*SOME* people have to be original. Well, your right ... . SOME PEOPLE ARE
FUCKING ORIGINAL... like prodigy haji... but your not. Your just following
them, making ascii like them, and basically .. style ripping them.
So .. in conclusion .. Im rather pissed off... I would like some feedback
on this shit... please /msg me on irc blkjack .. or leave me a note on
g0at... or even email me find out the email yourself .
Blah.
A rather pissed off, Black Jack.
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Scene Thing
by meatpod
Before I begin, Id like to say that this article is sort of a response
to the one by Sagramore, a piece that appeared in Tyrone 2. I dont know
Sagramore, so I mean him no offense by this piece. I do, however, disagree with
a few of the issues that he raised.
Anyway, lets begin. Like everyone has been at some point, I used to be
a little obnoxious kid who hung around in ansi and tried to get into the club
that the big boys were in. I hassled major artists who had no fucking idea who
I was they probably still dont, and I got banned a lot by ops who were
annoyed at my behavior. My art was lousy. I didnt even consider applying to a
group. Did this get me down? Yeah, sometimes it did. It didnt stop me from
pissing people off and getting banned, though.
Eventually, after a long chain of events that I dont feel like fully
exploring here, I wound up in one of the top two groups in the scene, Serial
I think that now, after Serial was disbanded, even the staunchest anti-Serial
Remorse members will acknowledge that we were pretty much neck and neck for a
long time. Having gone from an entry level position in the scene to being the
guy who has to turn people down when they apply to one of the top groups, I
think Im pretty well qualified to dispense with a few pieces of insight that
Ive picked up in no particular order:
1. Id like to say a few things about irc, since thats where a lot of scene
goings-on take place. First off, irc isnt fair. Some people are in
control, and some arent. You have to learn to accept that. You may
feel that the people who control the channel abuse their control. They
do, its true. Its too bad. It used to piss me off, but Ive learned
to relax about it. Which brings us to another point about irc.
2. Some people complain that ascii is getting to be another ansi. I dont
really see the problem with that. True, ansi has a certain infamy,
due to the relaxation of morals that some claim pervades the channel.
You have to realize, though, that this is irc, not the bible belt. Im
sure that if you have enough brains to be smart about computers, youd
be able to loosen up a bit. In addition, theres always the option of
going off and making your own channel if you dont like it. If the next
kHz is such a shrinking violet that he gets turned away by a bunch of
rowdy kids, tough noogies for him. That prospect doesnt really bother
me too much.
3. On the other hand, Id like to remind all of you prospective artists to
follow your hearts. Dont take bullshit from anybody, and say what you
think keep in mind people may not always agree with you. Some things
you have to deal with read: sit on it, and some you dont. You have
to learn to tell the difference, and no one can teach you. Its
something you have to come up with on your own. What this boils down to
is as follows: do what you feel is right not what you think you should
feel, what you DO feel.
4. I never used to understand why people werent really enthusiastic about me
drawing them something. Now I do. If you lack talent and I know you
can sure as fuck tell if you do, people arent going to be crazy about
your shit. You need to accept this. I try not to put down peoples
work, but I also dont appreciate being hassled when I deny someone
membership to a group. You will get better. You may have to settle for
a group of lesser calibre than Remorse or Serial on your way towards
scene stardom, if such a thing exists. On behalf of serial, though, I
feel compelled to mention that we often gave new artists a chance, even
if we didnt think they were up to par art-wise. Sometimes, having the
experience of being in a group can do a lot for the spirits of a
developing doodleboy.
5. How does it feel at the top or as close to the top as I am, personally?
Pretty much the same as it does at the bottom, except I know a bunch of
people by their first names. I feel essentially the same way about my
art, I still take the same pride in it. It feels good, too, when
people tell you they like what youve done, no matter how good you
think you are.
6. A quick way to get to the top? That doesnt exactly exist. To gain respect,
I would recommend that you keep quiet until youre pretty sure you know
the score, and then act humble. I dont know you -- if you get up in my
face, it doesnt help my opinion of you. Dont take things too
seriously, and dont give up.
All newbies eventually turn into the people they used to loathe, at
which point they realize they arent as bad as they thought theyd be.
Everybody gets their 15 minutes of fame Andy Warhol, and that includes you.
The scene is NOT a big deal -- its a hobby, and thats it except in the case
of VGA artists that go on to become professional graphic designers -- nothing
more, and you should treat it as such. The scene is ephemeral, nothing. Its
just a big exercise in bullshit. RELAX. If you dont agree with any of this,
fine. Its not my problem. Despite what you may think, this scene thing is an
open medium, so say whatever you like. Just be aware that nobody has ALL the
answers.
The scene brings people together in a way that nothing else is quite
able to. If youre lucky, youll make some great friends in the whole art and
competition process. With respects to that, Im very lucky, and I wish you the
same.
meatpod ex-serial ss 97, PROUD FUCKING DOODLEBOY
As with anything scene related, I feel obligated to write greets
brad and scott -- I love you guys. TRI forever.
john, mike, jeff, justin, and my
other first-name basis nigs -- HI GUYS!!!
josh and chris -- I couldnt do without my local nigs, guys. Peace.
everyone from serial has my respect.
everyone in remorse has my respect, even those of you who were... close-minded
at times.
if you didnt get a greet, chill, I still love you.
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Group leaders/artists trying to make money through the scene
by
Aneurysm/Piko
note: excuse the crappy art and this article probably doesnt represent the
views of the staff and other writers of tyrone emag
ACID PRODUCTIONS
One day in 1992, when ansi had just started to be produced for bbses,
someone emerged with a group called acid. This would be the first ever group to
emerge and produce art in an orderly fashion, releasing monthly. This was a
decent thing to do, as it paved the way for other groups such as ice, blade, ciaetc. But recently, acid has been using its power to manipulate other artists
to change the archive format from zipa scene tradition to rar, and for what
reason.
But this is not the purpose of my article. The acid cap is a decent cap,
but think about it. Your walking down the street in your acid cap, and you see
a crack addict, and the cap says acid productions. A crack addict would think
that your from some wild drug mass production company, and proceeds to attack
you for your hat. artists rendition
crack addict: whoa man, you must be on acid man, i love that stuff
acidcap guy : no man, im just a doodleboy
crack addict: ill kill you man.. your a dead man.
acidcap guy : no!!!!!
Ok ok, now this might not exactly happen, but what exactly is the point
of spending 16us 22canadian for a hat that says acid on it. To meet other
artists? Next thing you know theyll be acid t-shirts, posters, porno mags,
mousepads, music cds, and Buy stock in acid productions!. Another example of
trying to manipulate artists to spend money would be to register aciddraw. What
do you get by registering aciddraw. Jump to dos? If you have windows95, you can
multitask to a msdos window. Aciddraw is a useful utility, but for 20 dollars,
i think we could go without registering.
Probably theyll make you pay to upload your pack to the acid archive,
and for 2 dollars you get a bright shiny coin that says acid on it 10 dollars
shipping of course.
CIA PRODUCTIONS
Rather than in the case of acid, cia has taken a more direct approach
of selling stickers. For the low price of 20, you get a hundred stickers if
your not a member, but if you are, you get it for the lower price of 15.
Think about it, 15 for a bunch of adhesive stickers with amusing pictures on
them. Still, there are about 30 members, and about 300 or more people in the
scene. So most people would have to pay 20 dollars. Plus shipping, its a hell
of a lot of money for a bunch of things that you probably wont know what to do
with in the end anyway.
SCENE CDROMS theres another one
This one is REALLY stupid. Rather than getting any merchandise, you
get 2 cdroms filled with artpacks from 1996. The Acid archive has all of these
packs and more, and its all for free for now. Why dish out 25 us 33 can
for a cdrom filled with old artpacks, demos, and other things that if you were
uptodate with the scene from that year, had a record of all the stuff that you
would have seen anyway. Plus it didnt have all of the artpacks anyway. For 25
dollars, you could get a box of 100 3
diskettes to backup all the packs from
that year that you acually wanted, not a bunch of groups that youve probably
never heard of, or that you wanted to read about.
ARTISTS SELLING ART
Some artists are really lazy, and need motivation to draw. Sometimes
its necessary to trade goods and services for other things. But lets think aboutthis for a minute. Most artists sell logos for about 2-10 dollars. Many artists
will draw you something for free, or trade services. For instance, logo for
logo, access on the board for logo, etc. Somemany boards dont last forever,
and the people who run them, if they are persistant, will gather up many logos
and possibly pics for their board.
Artists who sell a logo that they worked like 10 minutes on for 5 is
a pretty good rate. If they were consitant and sold about 10 logos a day, thats
about 30 dollars an hour. More than most professionals make. Sometimes if your
FAVORITE artist in the whole world who quit drawing and you begged him for art,
but he said the only way he would draw is for money. Now you shipped him out themoney, and it wasnt what you wanted piece was ugly.. and you wanted your
money back, i really doubt the artist would send you your money back after
putting effort into a piece.
What im trying to say is that many artists would draw you art for free,
rather than pumping in lots of money into one piece that you may not like after
it was finished. But if your desperate to buy some art, a decent way would be
a compo. For 10 dollars you could get lots of work for your board, lots of
variety, it would be worth it for the ten dollars rather than buying one logo
for ten dollars.
FINAL WORD
Drawing shouldnt cost money, it should be something that is done
mainly because you think its fun and allows you to meet other people who have
some of the same interests as you. if your that desperate to spend your money
on acid caps, and cia stickers, or if you really want to spend your money on
an ansi or an ascii that you may or may not like anyway. Or if you want to spendyour money on something that has the packs that you probably have on your hard-
drive if you kept up to date throughout the year, its probably better that you
didnt have money at all. Or you spent it on something worthwhile. These are MY
views, and may or may not represent the views of the other views of the tyrone
staff. aneurysm/piko out.
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- Interview with the one, the only Black Jack
IRC log started Tue Aug 5 08:19
*** Inviting blkjack to channel trip-hop
.x blkjack blkjack@*toronto-06.ican.net has joined channel trip-hop
blkjack we lagged?
.x topic change on trip-hop by pariahFAT : iNTERViEWING bLKj4CK
pariahFAT nope
blkjack ok
.x Mode change +o blkjack on channel trip-hop by: pariahFAT.
pariahFAT you ready?
blkjack yeah, a little pissed off, but ready
blkjack :
pariahFAT hehe..
blkjack I cant unrar the remorse pack
pariahFAT Okay, first tell us your name, age, other interests, etc..
blkjack alright, my name is Jeff, my age is 16, and I like basketball
hockey.
blkjack I live in Oakville, Ontario, Canada.
blkjack phear my canuckiness
pariahFAT okay.. what groups have you been in and about when/how did you get
in the scene?
pariahFAT hehe..
blkjack I got into the scene by ripping art from old oil asia packs...
I put the original authors name on it, and mixed the fonts around to spell out deadlock .. my board.
pariahFAT woah.. elite
blkjack A local guy Suicidal Lemming was the one to hook me up with the
boards the art.. etc.
blkjack I guess after ripping about 20 different artists.. I got the hang
of it, and started to draw by myself.
blkjack fonts of course
pariahFAT i remember him.. he ran that group shade
blkjack yeah! You remember him?. . Shade was my link to the scene
blkjack I was in Shade while I was on local art boards TLA, Toons
Town, etc
blkjack I did PCBoard mods.. :
pariahFAT yeah.. he got me to join back when c0rosive was up and stuff
pariahFAT hehe..
blkjack yeah .. that group was pretty badass.. if we didnt kill it, we
wouldve ruled in two months.
blkjack mhz even joined when he was everlast.
pariahFAT true.. well, what have been some of your influences during your
time in the scene?
blkjack hmm .. not really picists actually .. Ive rarely seen any art from
MSD or Killahertz... although mrkites work, and nine lives did inspire me.
But from that, I guess all those font cut pasting, gave me different styles
to look at...
blkjack Im talking 2-5 fonts a day. :
pariahFAT woah..
blkjack And I didnt release the fonts... understand that, and I didnt
sign my name ... I just used them for my board.
blkjack I did that font shit during the whole month of august /96
pariahFAT when did you start realizing you had pic sk1LLZ?
blkjack I dont really regret it either... except the fact that its sort
of ripping ..
blkjack well .. one day I was whipping this carnage card against the side
of my house, and I thought.. hey, mabey I could draw this.
pariahFAT I remember that ascii : you sent it to me on c0r
blkjack And I did... : .. I still have it... it was my first pic ever...
and non-color too imagine that.. I INFACT have done about 80 MORE color
pics in the past then non-color
blkjack did i?
pariahFAT yeah..
blkjack word... remember that first spawn one I did?
blkjack like .. everyone wanted to do a joint with me.
pariahFAT yep.. i think i still have it in my lync directory :
blkjack haha
pariahFAT a lot of people think youre one of the best pic artists currently
how would you rate yourself?
blkjack myself? .. I dunno .. I cant *really* rate myself, and I dont think Im the best. I mean, weve got new old, artists... like : Terrato, tum
axb, even mrkite : .. theres alot of talent in the scene.... I have no idea how to rate myself.. I guess Im alright.
blkjack I know Im missing some BIG picists in the scene currently Im
stupid .. so .. sorry to all those :
pariahFAT yeah.. there are a LOT of good pic guys.. gdr, axb, terrato, tum,
you, etc..
blkjack oh yeah .. gdr
blkjack SORRY GDR!
pariahFAT anyway.. i forgot to ask this before, what groups are you
currently in?
pariahFAT heh
blkjack Im in remorse.
blkjack :
blkjack thats it .. good ol remorse.
pariahFAT and whats the funnest group youve been in?
blkjack ohh .. the most fun group Ive been in.
blkjack lets see... Id have to say, hrmm .. echo.
blkjack echo was one of my first groups plain .. and its local.
blkjack It was really cool being in echo, and I give greets to watOr 4thy
for making it happen.
pariahFAT yeah.. echos elite..
blkjack werent you in echo?
blkjack echo!ascii ?
pariahFAT i was in plain in early 96 and echo at first
blkjack ok
pariahFAT then they nuked the ascii dept :
blkjack YEAH!
blkjack THOSE BASTARDS!
pariahFAT hehe
pariahFAT are there any groups youd like to be a part of in the future? or
you plan on sticking with rmrs?
blkjack I wanna guest in cia fuel at least once.. : .. I mean, the knight
napalm are like, SUPERCOOL... I also wanna hook up with odelay .. but
since I dont draw enough.. : .. you know.
pariahFAT yeah.. how many times do you draw in a month about?
blkjack now a days? .. one ascii .. : .. this month, if I get new material I could draw up to 7 pics... but .. If I dont .. Ill probally do the one Im half done at the moment.
pariahFAT what are the top 3 ascii groups in your opinion?
blkjack umm, lets see. 1 remorse, 2 kwest, 3 odelay
blkjack but ... odelay hasnt released yet
blkjack so .. well see
blkjack look for good things from odelay
pariahFAT aieght.. and who are the top 5 newschoolers picists/fontists in
blkjack betcha didnt expect soi
blkjack EH?
blkjack:ascii I have it
pariahFAT hehe
pariahFAT soi draws some elite pics
blkjack yeah
blkjack Ive seen like .. 2 pics from him
blkjack and i loved them
pariahFAT okay.. where do you think ascii is headed? in the last few months
its really boosted as a medium
blkjack true, I think ascii is still going strong.. I personally have no
idea where its headed.. I mean, in a month, what if irc died? .. or some shit..
that would fuck us over.
pariahFAT yeah.. the scene is sort of unstable..
pariahFAT anyway, in conclusion do you have any lasting greets/things youd
like to say?
blkjack well .. I could greet about 100 people.. : .. but Ill only greet
local people that I talk voice to :: dave, neil, craig, sean, raph, bob EH,
tim, jamie, and dan.
blkjack corinthian, nosanity, syntax, psyonide, prime.
blkjack prime is a new pic artists.
blkjack like .. REALLY new.
blkjack artist even
pariahFAT what group is he in?
blkjack hes in gemfire
blkjack this local group to me.
blkjack :
blkjack he just started drawing 2 weeks ago.
pariahFAT aieght.. well, good luck with rmrs and its been fun interviewing
you.
blkjack WORD!
blkjack alright, no problem :
** IRC log ended Tue Aug 5 08:56
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- Cains Corner
Whuddup, Cain here. Empty asked me to do a monthly column for Tyrone, I
gladly accepted. I, as does every other person in ascii have a message to
get out there, this is obviously a good way to do so.
To give you a swift background on myself, Ive been in the scene for
three years, Ive been through groups such as s0ap, basic, noname, the basic
revival, serial for 3 hours, cia, remorse, and now Kwest. Ive seen a lot, from
rags to riches you could say. Ive run three groupsdivisions.. Noname, Cia,
currently Kwest. I showed Polymorph how to do it, then he started kicking my
ass, same with Discyple hi guys!.. now Im just a disrespected veteran with a
cause.
Im going to touch on something which is the main drive of the scene
today, and the scene past Style, and the originality of the style. Yeah yeah,
yaddi yaddi, that Cain guy bitches and complains to much, fuck that. Ive just
read what Sargon has to say about style
Sargon-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Third off, Id like to comment on the state of the scene today. I think right
now, there is an emphasis on originality, but the methods people are taking
to find originality are in a sense, unoriginal. For example, people are
using different characters outside of the sign. Tek and the Prodigy started
that trend, and now there are 3944219 artists following it. I think a style
is just how your ascii looks, not how you draw your ascii. I mean, its come
down now, to where people think drawing with the sign isnt original
anymore. But I know people can do it, Ive seen people come in, and do it,
during serials life. axb, tum, compuman, meatpod, and others. So guys, be
original, but dont follow trendy originality.
Done-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Word, lets use some personal experience to back this up. Black Jack,
of Remorse Ascii, has said to me many a time You cant shape, shade, or curve
.. alright, fine.. lets check smore examples to contradict the little fucker
Discofunk ascii, released in kwest-------------------------------------------
yyyyyy
: yyy
: yyyyyy :
ll .,
yyyyyy
l
b,.....
: . yyyyyy 7 ..,4
7 SSyy..
l yyyy .
b. yyyy : ::: b. 4
7 , 4: b.4
,4y,..,4 yy .
,4
4 yyyyyyyy ...,d
. l b,.,d: Y
: Y7 S
yyyyyy
yyy
Done-------------------------------------------------------------------------
And the following is an ascii by myself from the same month. Something
to remember Black Jack always seems to support Discofunk, this is why he is
being used as an example.
Cain-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ahh, to be a s0ap son again.
7
, 7
,?
,7,
,?
, : 7 ,,
,l,,
S7, ,l
?7
?7
C
,7
?P
,P
,7
A 7
I,
?7
N7
,P
: K
7
?P ,
, l W
, E
l
,? S
l ,
7
,7
,S,P S
,7 ,,
?7
?P
S7
Done-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ok then, now this is not to say that I am better then Disco, nor that
me and my group Kwest are the best ascii group in the scene. But, if we refer
to Black Jacks comment of You cant shape, shade, or curve .. Heh, Id like
to know what you say to anyone whos style doesnt require outrageous curves, a
massive amount of shading, and extreme shaping. And, if we look at the whole
scheme of things, who the hell is Black Jack to judge a font artist? Ill admit
my style is lacking at the moment, simply because Im 2 months out of practice
though, not because I cant Shape, Shade, or curve. Whatever, Black Jack, get
off me.
I fully support Sargons comment I think style, is just how the ascii
looks:: Wordemonup Brad. So, in a half state of closing, dont listen to the
goofballs that judge your ascii, half the time most of them dont know what the
fuck theyre talking about, refer to Black Jack as The Flaming 12 year old,
and look forward to Kwests 6th release, it should be phat. Last off, grab a
style, dont be afraid to rub shit in someones face, dont be afraid to be you
when it comes to ascii.. and when goofs like Black Jack come around talking
bullshit, ignore him. Draw ascii for what it is to YOU, not for what it is to
everyone else.
- Cain-ONE, out.
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tyrone
Homo Ascii review
short and sweet - we own you.
CLIT-63.ZIP reviewed by Pariah and Prodigy
CM-CYA.ASC par - now a days a lot of asciists are starting to use
different characters in ALL of their asciis only
because other people are doing it. Theres a fine line
seperating the originators neil, tek, pat, etc..,
those just experimenting and those doing something to
try and fit in. Luckily compuman has been drawing like
this since when it wasnt popular, and this logo/pic
is yet another sweet compuman ascii. 8
prod - uh.. yeah, justin. i dont know this guy, honest. 7
DY-*.*.ANS par - amazing.. discyple does it all 10
prod - CRAB. ASCII BLOWJOB. BIRD. JEN. AMAZING 10
MP-*.*.ANS par - everyone else really liked meatpods stuff this month
except me. its just too scattered for my liking. 7
prod - Justins been acting strange this month. I think its
due to him taking that bottle of asprin he found. 9
SAR-*.*.ASC par - sargon stays true to his regular logo style with some
added twists. the pics excluding the rip are really
good too. 9
prod - SARGON SUCKS, AND HE IS GAY. GAY GAY GAY.
but I suppose his ascii is tolerable. 8
TRI-COCK.ASCpar - cALL gUINESS, iTZ tHE wORLDZ lONGEST pENIS!@ -
prod - i wish my penis was that long. oh yeah, IT IS. -
US-TA.ASC par - incredible.. excluding the shaping on the top of the
forehead the pic is excellent and nahals logo is
fucking massive. 10
prod - justin forgot to tack the prod part on, so I got
confused and it took me 2 hours to figure out what was
going on. Anyway, Id wager this is probably one of the
best pics ive seen from brad in a while. 8
Pariahs comments - The past two Homoaka Clit releases prove that a group withno intentions of competing can still attract quality asciists and release
high quality packs. I still think that Sargon will start a competitive group up
any time now, but in the meantime Homo packs are a humorous alternative to the
seriousness of other competitive groups.
Prodigys comments - I was supposed to be in this pack, but I wasnt. Therefore
everyone in Clit should get colon cancer. Apart from that, the pack was proof
that brad is the ascii scenes puppet master. The texts not reviewed were
hilarious, and I almost wet myself laughing. Good work, ladies.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------People tend to get riled up when they see a review that doesnt concur with whatthey think, so speaking for Neil and myself Im going to briefly explain how
you should interpret our reviews. First off, we do our best to not carry ANY
personal grudges when reviewing asciis, this means if one of us or both of us
give you a low numerical rating and/or comment its because we just didnt like
your asciis. Secondly, I like to think of these reviews as being pretty damn
fair, were not brutal and if you DO get a low numerical rating and/or comment
well do our best to explain why, not just say this sucks 2. Also, use
your common sense. Chances are a lot of the things we might notice are things
that other people including you, the artist wouldnt notice.. Unless you get
below a 7 when you average BOTH reviewers numerical ratings you shouldnt be
offended in any way. The whole concept behind having two VERY DIFFERENT
reviewers is to show how much our opinions differ. Thats pretty much it, if
you have any feedback please send it to pariah@alienz.org or dot@cybersolutions.net.
1-4 below average 5-6 average 7-8 above average 9-10 perfector close
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tyrone
- Kwest Ascii
s1 / . -----/
The 5th Kwestion?
5THKWST.ZIP reviewed by Pariah and Prodigy
AXB-KWST.ASCpar - this ones a little too blocky 7 prod - you take coloured ascii a little too literally. 6BIO-*.*.ASC par - lots of great oldschools from roger this month - prod - good, good. CLUSTER THEM. -CN-*.*.ASC par - cains usual style, nice and funky.. 7 prod - these arent very good. PLEASE, DO SOMETHING NEW. 5DY-KLITE.ASCpar - a nice inverted logo from discyple 9 prod - absolutely fucking trippy. i dig it, scott. 9H4-KWST3.ASCpar - a really nice logo from pat, back to the lettering style9 prod - wackyhajitstyleez. keep it up, pat. 8IS-BYE.ASC par - this is more of a farewell than an ascii its sad to see
risu leave, hell be missed..
prod - what the hell? justin ORIGINALLY voided out my part, i
guess in the interests of saying bye in his own little
way. Well, let me tell you... I NEVER liked Risus stuff.
I could draw 300 asciis a month at Risu quality. BUT I
WONT, CAUSE HES NO GOOD. Bye Risu!
M-KLEENX.TXTpar - maybe im not viewing this right, it looks too scattered- prod - fiiine oldschools from the midniiight judge. -MA-ONEL.ASC par - another nicely drawn massm logo 8 prod - John... give it up. 6MH-AXSB.ASC par - too spread out for me.. - prod - MONSTER OLDSCHOOL! Ace is the best oldschooler around -MT-KWEST.ASCpar - pretty nice.. 7 prod - Not bad, not bad at all. That you, Mike? 7PM-KWURG.ASCpar - rough on the shaping, but its nice to see poly back 7 prod - POLYMORPH IS THE BEST ASCII ARTIST IN THE SCENE, OR ANY
SCENE. Bow down. This guy has more originality than Id
ever hope to have. Straight fucking ascii. Its wicked.10SAR-DIS2.ASCpar - another nice compact ascii from sargon.. 8 prod - you bash black jack for logos like this, brad. 6SD-TUT.ASC par - this is as good as it is funny, nice bubble style.. 8 prod - I would trade my thumb to get you in Odelay. 9TK-KWEST.ASCpar - tek has found a really nice yet unique logo style 8 prod - jason, my boy. this is another fine ascii. cool S 7
Pariahs comments - this pack is smaller than expected, but still full of art
from most of the big names that have been with kwest for awhile.
Prodigys comments - What a surprise, the original members of kwest make the
pack save cain while the latter members pull it down. BUT POLYMORPHS ONE
LOGO MAKES UP FOR IT.
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- Odelay Ascii
ODELAY PACK 10. ITS ON LIKE DONKEY KONG
qp
777b.477
b. 4
qp
qp
b.4
yy
qp
ODELAY
l888888: l
SSllll
l.
***sssl.
l llllll
iiiyy llllllyy
i iiiiii
iiiiiiiii:
..... : ................ ...... haji.
ODELAY10.ZIP reviewed by Pariah and Arrogance!
2N-*.*.ASC par - nicely styled stuff from s2n. -
aCk! - Very purdy. Wasnt terribly wild about 2N-HOS.ASC. -
5Q-*.*.ASC par - looks a little like necroms stuff. -
aCk! - Squish Bomb! -
74-EZ.ASC par - an abstract inverted ascii, I like : 8
aCk! - Originality! I like! -
aCk! - Originality! I like! -
BIO-*.*.ASC par - once again, no dissapointments.. good stuff from r0ger -
aCk! - Little orphan Bio has a very nice style.-
DS-COLLI.ASCpar - dead soul has gotten a lot better at logos.. 7
aCk! - Most of the logos were excellent.-
EG-HWX2.ASC par - evil Genius isnt that bad at oldschool :-
aCk! - Odd. I like the center ascii.-
EMP-*.*.ASC par - these asciis are amazingly smooth..8
aCk! - Empower? WHERE THE HELL DID HE COME FROM? WHY IS-
HE SO FUCKING GOOD?!?
GV-BM!.ASC par - i dunno, i just dont like this.. -
aCk! - I like grooves style. And his handle is cool.-
H4-*.*.ASC par - unique character choice and smooth shapes n34T9
aCk! - Haji is the lord and savior of ascii art.
KO-*.*.ASC par - some of the most creative toon/anime ive ever seen 9
aCk! - Konami racks the block, hardk0re.
MA-ODEL.ASC par - another nice massm logo.. 8
aCk! - Massies fade style rocks me hard.-
MJ-ODE10.ASCpar - mjay has a nice compact style -
aCk! - Damn. Its too short. I wanted more art@!-
MM-*.*.ASC par - nice oldschools and a creative pic -
aCk! - Quite grewvy. I like this guys style. Very eye-
pleasing.
NS-TLC.ASC par - a little too spread out for me..6
aCk! - Nos is fuckin-a excellent!-
PAR-PB.ASC n/a -
aCk! - Very pretty. I enjoyed it.-
PR-*.*.ASC par - VERY nice.. especially PR-JUST and PR-TRB 10
aCk! - Neil is the man of the hour. His shit rules.-
SAR-MONK.ASCpar - nice compact newschool from sargon.8
aCk! - Sargon consistantly produces fun stuff.
SMP-*.*.ASC par - i liked the pic, but vomit isnt really a logo style 6
aCk! - Enjoyable and humorous. All in all, a very sexy pic. -
TK-*.*.ASC par - more creative newschool from an odelay artist 8
aCk! - Tek is one of my favorite artists. His shit is amazing-
TUM-ODEL.ASCpar - another great pic from tum, the logo is pretty nice too9
aCk! - TUM Ruler of ASCIi pic art. YEAH!-
US-JUST.ASC par - okay shaping but the colored s go against it..-
aCk! - I find this to be a freakin cool ascii. -
US-ODELX.ASCpar - yAY!@ sPEARS bACK!@ however this is a little basic 7
aCk! - I luph IT! SHPEUH RULES!!!-
US-STORT.ASCpar - weirder than the others, but still a solid abstract pic8
aCk! - I like this kinda stuff. Its great! -
Pariahs comments - Another great pack from the odelay crew, slightly better
than the previous one. It looks like odelays around to stay this
time.
Arrogances comments - I love this pack. I do not have one negative comment
about it. Each Odelay artist has at least one distinctive style, and
they use it well. Great pack, guys. You rule. Notice that I do not
number grade. I give compliments as much as possible, and suggest
improvements when necessary.
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tyrone
- Biogenesis and his toys.
This is a tight joke to pull on your friends. Now, do what I say children.
Do the actions as i call them. You better go to the bathroom now, before
its to late. Hold out three fingers, ones a blonde, another a brunette,
and a red head. Lick the first one. Did it feel like the first time you
had sex? Usually no so continue. Lick the secound one. Did it feel like
the first time you had sex? Usually no so continue. Lick the Third one.
Did it feel like the first time you had sex? Usually no so continue.
Jesus, you must have had a good first fuck. Now place all your fingers in
a fist, and shake em all up. Did it feel like the first time you had sex?
Brought to you by biOgenesis, supporting asciis JND condoms. Oh, and
if that was not funny enough for you, I would like to say this, get
prepared: Sargon There we are, now heres some quotes. sargon but, i
never had sex before tk man, i need to be laid. nOk- i used to make
holes in my matress, for pleasure and stuff. hotgirl i just fingered my
self, u r a good fuck. G0AT YOUR ALL OWNED BY EMPTY
serial2n is gone
*. out chasing jews - since *9:24 pm est empty Your my doll rock and
roll, touch me there hanky panky
Hi empty, mrkite!
biOgenesis.
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- WindRider The Intern tells all
Dont make me send you to the office.
I havent had to say that yet, but it could happen in the near future.
My name is WindRider. I am a teacher. Well, more like an intern, but
that isnt the point. I am or once was, depending upon how you decide
participation a part of Remorse, Quad-P, and PiPE!lit or however its
spelled.
Did I mention that my students are all between ages 12 and 14?
I shouldnt even go into the ways that being a teacher of girlies
that age can turn a 25 year old guy into a deviant. If you want to know,
catch me on irc and ask me. Im likely to go into a long ramble about
Grade 9 chicks.
In recent weeks, people have asked me what if some artscene guy is in
one of your classes? Frankly, I dont give a rats ass. Im there as
part of my university education, and nothing is going to stand in the way
of that. I am the tacher, they are the student. But that doesnt seem to
be much of a problem, not many people in the sleepy little town im
interning at are actually hooked up. This the artscene stuff has
nothing to do with real life. I havent really had time over the last
while to contribute to groups, but I will when and if I can.
In writing this pointless little tirade for empty and all the boys of
Tyrone, Im hoping to signal to all of us that Im not about to drift off
into some abyss. I finish this part of the academic year on December 19,
after which you can expect to see me involved up to my big old flabby ass
sooner than you may think.
Yes, I know. Youre scared that will actually happen. So am I, but
for different reasons. So until the next issue of Tyrone which should be
sometime around March 1998 if things keep up. h0h0h0, I know youll all
miss me more than mere words can state. But that doesnt mean you
shouldnt try.
Ill catch you later,
WindRider rmrs1981
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- Why we own you.
How did the Wu-Trank! Clan own you?
by Fahrenheit / Remorse / Katharsis / EL8 / Koredump / Wu-Trank!
By now you have all heard of the most phearocious clan known
throughout the darkest corners of IRC. The Wu-Trank! clan. Why do we own
you? We have been around s0n, we know respect. We know who to give it to
and why. We know everything about you. We know your name, where you live,
we know how many times you jack off a day looking at our asciis. What we
dont know is, why we have let you live. Does it sound like I have a God
complex? Good. I do. We own you, s0n. You have the right to phear now.
One day, in an IRC channel far, far away. Two loced out ascii
drawers corroborated on the ultimate 1-2 to pull on the scene. We will
start a new way to monopolize the scene. A private crew solely built for
the idea to bring together the best oldschool ascii drawers there are into
one unifying clique. The other ninja agreed, that ninja was Hiro
Protagonist. The other ninja, that was me.
We knew exactly who we would honor by asking to join this most
elite tribe. We were on a mission. An IRC mission. Seek out the best
oldschool ascii drawers we knew and get them in. A quick hop-and-a-leap
later we were in ansi. We got Enigmatic, Whodini, and Cypherhex up in it
with the quickness. Whodini had to speak his piece though, This group is
so elite, we must keep it to ourselves, if anyone finds out about us it
might cause discomfort in Trank!. We must let it marinate for a bit.
Whodini was smart. He knew the sheer eliteness of Wu-Trank! would scare
the rest of the drawers off. We had to be diskreet ninjaz.
Due to a leak in the clan, news quickly got out. People swarmed to
us to try to get in to the inner-circle. We all told them to lick our
nutsax. We were too elite for them. They were *SCARED*. My bezt lover
ewheat was newschool drawer. I love him so much I bent the rules. He was
in. All of a sudden, ewheat was no longer an ansi drawer, he devoted his
time to monopolizing the ascii scene. Back in the day, the current ascii
ran ansi. We had complete control over all the ansi dewdlers too. And
life was good.
Further down the spiral, we got more recruits as they came back.
First Omicron joined, then Ack, and then our good friend Necromancer. We
all still consist of the clan known as Wu-Trank!. And you know what else?
We still own you.
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tyrone
- G0AT Speaks
Hello. My name is g0at. Ive been the ascii bot for a really long time
now, and over the history of my watching the channel, Ive seen lots of
people come and go. First off, I really dont understand this whole
ascii concept. What is it? I mean, people talk about some group, and
scene, and doodle, remorse, odelay, pics, fonts, I mean
really, what is all this jargon you strange beings talk of? I read this
skills mag once, and all I saw was a bunch of and / and - characters,
thats really weird, and there was some gangster guy screaming about
killuminati and bombfirst. Ive even downloaded some of these ascii
packs, which I assume is a collection of these ascii things you humans
talk of. I tried to view the file in several ways..
edit rmrs-14.zip
type rmrs-14.zip
I even tried renaming it to a batch file, and running the batch file, but
it made my computer spit out a bunch of junk, and it went down. Thats
why I wasnt on ascii for a while. Some D0NKEY wannabe motherfucker was
sitting in my channel. Can you BELIEVE that? A poser, trying to be me, on
MY turf. People get shot for that, you know. And have you seen D0NKEY
since then? No. You do the math.
Anyhow, back to this ascii stuff. What is odelay? Isnt that an album
by beck? Does that mean beck makes ascii too? I fail to see the
connection between this ascii stuff, and music.
One thing I could actually look at was a colly, although I dont think
colly is a synonym for ascii, when I edited it, it showed a bunch
more of those -, /, , and other characters. Does that mean skills
mag is a colly? Hmm, Im starting to understand this. But why isnt it
called skills colly, or skills colly magazine.
Well anyways, if one of you people wants to write me and explain this
ascii stuff, mail g0at@hazir.tapu.kx. Next time Ill write some more
about my ascii scene trek.
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- A word from Remorse Ascii
Remorse Update
Omicron81
------------- History
Well, as far as new shit goes on the Remorse Front, theres not a
whole lot new that I can think of off the top of my head. Weve released
14 packs, 9 of those since our reincarnation, and they all kick ass. Even
the first ones kick ass. I know you may be saying oh my god you are dumb,
the first remorse packs from 1994-1995 suck balls. Well that is untrue.
They rocked you, they rocked your mom, they rocked your dog and they rocked
your fat sister. We helped pioneer this scene that pMk and tinyz kicked off,
and those are historical treasures that represent the beginning, the end,
the everything of the IBM Ascii scene.
------------- Joining
Furthermore, remorse was more than a group back then, it was a clique.
Not like the Nasty Boy Clique arizona rap group, or even the phunk junkeez,
but a tightly knit group of assholes who liked to draw ascii and piss off
people in ansi by taking it over almost daily. Remorse still remains a
strong group of individuals. Not nearly as loyal as the original set of
members, but still we kick ass. If you want to become part of this group,
this fraternity or brotherhood of ascii masters, then all you need to do is
obtain a copy of REMORSE.APP from Omicron me, Whodini, Acidjack, Empty,
mHz, or Necromancer. Once you have filled out this application and included
some pieces of your best work, you should go ahead and mail it to
whodini@acid.org with a Carbon Copy to kaleidas@pacbell.net. All we ask of
our members is loyality. From there you are free to go ahead and dominate the
ascii scene in any way you see fit.
------------ Quake Clan Clan!remorse
In other news that might also be of interest to applying artists,
remorse now has a quake clan that any remorse member may join if he wishes to
participate. A side note for this tho, if you dont play as a team and dont
contribute to helping the clan, we will probably kick you out. Right now the
clan members all contribute and practice regularly, which is expected if you
want to be in the clan. Oh, and if you wish to join the clan and need a copy
of quake, quakeworld, and/or team fotress, contact omicron or empty and we
will give you access to the private Clan!Remorse ftp site. ** If you wish to
join up, email empty@fastlane.net or omi@breaks.for.alienz.org, or send a
G0AT note to Empty.
------------ Response to the homosexual ascii pack
Well what can i say about this ascii pack? Have we not become
accustomed to such childish gayity from Sargon? The only good artist in the
whole pack is Discyple. And the Remorse logo next to a Swastika was not
appreciated by anyone in remorse. We never have and never will be associated
with the National Socialist Party.
omicron
omi@breaks.for.alienz.org
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- Quotes and more quotes
blkjack drax got beaten up, then anal raped by a gang of 68 year old men -
drAx blkjack, no, thats impossible-
blkjack not in sweden
drax and this bullshit about killing bird eating spiders, we have a nice
place for those, and other small animals ..
* drAx is gone *time to smoke some DICK! - email *draxfood@hotmail.com
- since *9:12 am EST
drAx You should make me an own quote thingey, like mcanal and stuff ..
drAx blkjack hey thats enough .. your hurting my feelings sniff
*** empty changes topic to well drax is just gay.
drAx I tried to install linux on your shell .. I *think* I might have
messed something up!
cash Mrsbill is mrbill@did.dogs.with.sandpapers.condoms.for.an.oline.com
blkjack well, if i had a million dollars, Id goto world vision sponsor
about .. umm .. 100 kids. Yeah, thatd be cool.. then I could play god!
sargon dude, its my dick ..
empty sargon: dude..show it too someone who cares..like Tg..or mHz
biogen If I do, you wont respect me! stammered the gorgeous Congressmans page as the corpulent dirty old man defiled her muscular ear lobes and crammed his humongous candlestick into her dusty and cobwebby furrow.
sargon WHATS UP WITH THAT DICK? .. sargon IS IT BRONZE?
biogen this is hard to say and stuff, but sometimes i wonder, when will my
dad buy me a freakin computer? i heard the internet has some wild stuff and
shit, ahwell. fuckit dad.
drAx biogen i want tew connect tew your board, and bitchX from it
vagina crazycat, is it true? i heard you broke your neck so you ..
could suck your own dick.
Shypht Serial2n: I try to be lame.. its my goal in life ya know?
wzombie Speaking of hanson, I think theyve got STANIC messages in their
music.. but you gotta play it forwards to hear them..:
dngrmouse meltdwn: your fucking IQ is less than your penis size.
iq fucking 2, you penis being 3
nosane the only black show i watch is cops.
ewheat The cops in Cops treat the black people like shit... but thats O.K.
drAx ahhh, what a beautiful day, i think ill just beat the shit outta
someone and take their money
mSO- thats my personal opinion --
oMi yer personal opinion was not accepted, please try it again
cr4sh S+Z crash : crash@your.penile.length.is.insufficient.for.python.net Crash
blkjack martz did any fine greece citizens rape you there? ..
or was your anal hole ALWAYS this wide?
serial2n drax knows alll about jerking off. --
drAx yah, i know everything there is tew know --
drAx im an expert on jerking
drAx Thats it , Thats all?, vAN dAMN!@, what happened, what happened tew
the pimps? what happened tew the guns? .. where is all the crackword-beep--
.. GARBAGE?!2?@
drAx AHhh, what a fucking great day, i think ill go tew the jungle and be
a fucking dick-head!@
drAx I wonder why i feel so good, could it be the music? could it be the
weather? or is it the just the fact that i just eat everybody damnit, life
is grand, life is great, i think ill have myself a cheap date, some girl i
could take to mcdonalds, tew all you suckers out there, kiss off!@
prodigy KARMA POLICE, ARREST THIS MAN. HE TALKS IN MATHS,
HE BUZZES LIKE A FRIDGE. HES LIKE A DETUNED RADIO.
prodigy KARMA POLICE, AREST THIS GIRL. HER HITLER HAIRDO IS MAKING ME
FEEL ILL. AND WE HAVE CRASHED HER PARTY.
soil HELLO I CAN DO SOME ASK KEY BUT MY MOTHER SAIS THAT IT IS REAL GOOD
drAx infect got so horny he had tew disconnect and masturbate with my pic!@
* hajimatic is away, toilet - sick from taco bell log:ON email:not-set-yet
drAx The moment i wake-up, me gonno put on some make-up.
drAx im a barbie girl, in a barbie world
seismic in a barbie world, wrapped in plastic, its fantasic.
imagination, life is your creaton
nnomatic who cares, i dont mean shit in the scene any more, heh.
im just here for the anal
*** drAx was kicked by nnomatic ultra-super-mega gay
NECRONITE WILL KILL YOUR DOG.irc nK
crEEd: current netsplit from irc.ascii.is.boring *.im.gonna.slip.com
*** nMANCEr changes topic to IF YOU HAVE ANY COMPLAINTS ABOUT OPS,
EMAIL NECROM@REMORSE.ORG
necronite ive been banning people since before irc was invented
nMANCEr Something crawled OUT of my ass this morning. It was brown,
and had no legs. I think it was a snake.
shroom its really lame having 2 groups, or three, remorse is a damn
monopoly :
prodigy ASCII IS A HAVEN... FOR RACIAL DISCRIMINATION! HIP HIP HOORAY!
HIP HIP HOORAY! HIP HIP HOORAY!
vermin13 ANAL SATISFACTION, THE NATURAL WAY
prodigy JOIN ODELAY OR I BRING BACK HORRORCORE RAP
empty d00d..if i had a million dollars i wouldnt waste it on some kids..
id go by some 16 year old whores..
empty -fuckbunny- You have 6 notes waiting on fuckbunny. --
empty i think hes trying too tell me something --
empty but what..i dont know
empty Think about it...if everything was the way it was on irc the way it
is outside, youd walk outside and instead of drive by shootings there would
be drive by uNFings and youd see guys fucking other guys in the ear and
shit, and youd see thousands of people fucking g0ats....
*** empty changes topic to If you arent in remorse, you are owned
*** compuman- changes topic to AsciiGuy anyone here do ascii?
infect cock is the most common word in ascii nowadays..heh..
compuman- the most common phrase in here would have to be Ban sargon!
empty You know, demi more did a new movie...its called A Few good Hags
*** empty changes topic to New macaroni and cheese with 95 more gay in it
-empty- wallops:ascii i know the best way too get a quick high.. ---
-empty- wallops:ascii ban sargon and make him bitch and whine too get back in..
its so fucking halarious
*** sargon was kicked by empty .:hamsteR. x- pointless ban
empty sargon im gay ---
empty a quote that is true but hasnt been said
serial2n well this is what i though before seeing sargons pics. this.
brad sitting on the fence, his straw hat on, with a stick of straw comming
out of his mouth, overalls, and a pich fork in his left hand and his right
in the yEEEHHH HAW movement.
GiZmO Hi I am looking for a ascii picture of a maraguana leaf
sargon Ajack: Uhm, I dont run a mag - blkjack sargon dump... -
sargon oh yeah
sargon My name is Mussolini.
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- And last but not least, a word from our sponser - JND
THE JIZZ AND DITCH SAGA
One sunny wednesday afternoon this summer, I found myself walking into
an anonymous video rental outlet. Upon entry to the store, I jammed
my hand into my pants pocket to retrieve car keys. I felt a plastic wrapper,
and thought to myself I dont recall buying gum. It turns out, in fact,
that this was an empty condom wrapper. I was shocked and revolted.
I promply exited the store, disposed of the wrapper in question, and
continued home, to relay the story to friends on IRC, wash my hands,
and try to formulate theorems about this miraculous appearance.
It was late, and only a scant few english-speaking
residents were vocal in ascii. Among them were pimps Messiah,
Ack, and Omicron. I promptly relayed the story, much to
everyones amazement. Soon enough, Messiah proposed that
damn.. someone just jizzed, and ditched it.
It was a unanimous opinion that a condom capable of easily
facilitating post-jizz disposal was truly a breakthrough.
The proposed condom prototype was tentatively named JizzNDitch.
The rest is legend...
Slogans and JizzNDitchc SPECIALTY Brand Condoms:
AcidJack I want a condom that says Hey bitch, I got shit to do,
thats why I trust JizzNditch
AcidJack JizzNDitch gives me the freedom to go places and not
worry about some bitch feeling detached.
mESSIAH jizznditch. condom of the 21st century
mESSIAH you dont take it off, it ditches itself
Kel7har you can have you newborn baby get an permanent
jizznditch condom attached at the low price of 19.95 shiping
and surgery not included
** uhh.. this one might not make it into our projected
marketing scheme.. you crazy Swede.
AcidJack JizzNDitch brand condoms! Try NEW JizzNDitch Cock
Cleaning variety!
** post-coital cock cleaning. now theres an idea.. no
more jizzy dick sticking to your boxer shorts.
Kel7har we also have a chistian version of the JizzNDitch
called Jizz with jesus and have crosses and the bible writen on it.
** main area of distribution: Utah.
Kel7har JizzNDitch. You have never enjoyed a hooker better.
AcidJack for that great-sex feeling withOUT the bitch sleeping
in your bed, try JizzNDitch!
mESSIAH JizznDitch NARROW TM for dicks that arent that
meaty
Kel7har JizzNDitch Hardon - For people with problem getting it
up. The condom contains small metal bars and a power-pump that
chokes your dick, disableing blood to get out.
** ouch!
AcidJack Do you hate that dirty dick feeling after sex? Does
your bitch seem to fall asleep when its time to clean cock? Try
our new suction brand JizzNDitch condoms!
** suction acoutrements now synergistically blended with the
cock-cleaning variety
Kel7har JizzNDitch powerengine. lay back and let the condom
take care of your local whore.
dy1 JizzNDitch JIZZBAG For men with a tendency towards
abnormally large ejaculation
AcidJack jizznditch FEMALE condoms. girl, sometimes you just
wanna cum and leave a brutha with a hard, cold cock
** we have already signed a deal with Tommy Hilfiger to
distribute a JnD FEMALE with every Tommy Girl purchase
at major department stores.
mESSIAH JizzNDitch Flavors tm we come in baloney, sausage,
minty fresh, and for the lesbians, vaginal flavor addon pack
** vaginal addon pack sales skyrocketed last week, with the
revolutionary marketing pitch Hey, tastes like vagina!
Retailers in the Arizona region report no sales.
mESSIAH JizzNDitch NOWOMAN tm condom. hey, who needs a
woman when ive got my jizznditch
** prototypes were tested for years by blkjack.
fortunately, his idea for having a washable claire danes tattoo
on the inner lining of the condom did not pass by our RD boys.
mESSIAH JizzNDitch : the only condom that takes advantage of
risctm mmxtm technology, by making it seem like the pussy is
better than it really is
mESSIAH dy1 yeah, but we shouldnt limit the market just to
shallow men
dy1 messiah - thats true, lets invent a JizzNDitch SENSITIVE
mESSIAH JizzNDitch Sensitive : When you just HAVE to bring
her to orgasm
AcidJack for men who have places to go, but still want to give
pleasure
Kel7har JizzNDitch ANIMAL - For the sheep in you.
** obviously, our Swedish market has special needs to be catered to.
YOU CRAZY SWEDE.
mESSIAH JizzNDitch SMOKERS EDITION, takes care of that after
jizz nicotine we all crave
dy1 why not just line the inside of the JND with Nicoderm patches?
dy1 JizzNDitch MASTURBATION EDITION - When you just dont want
to wipe up your mess with an athletic sock
** once again, tested extensively by blkjack
AcidJack Take it from me, Acid Jack of ACiD/Remorse fame
JizzNDitch brand condoms are the best thing you can do to improve
your sex life
** WE EVEN HAVE CELEBRITY ENDORSEMENT.
mESSIAH JizzNDitch MILITARY, top secret, this condom uses the
latest in radar dampening technology so she never knows quite when
you went in.
AcidJack Do you smell something? Dont worry! New SCENTED
JizzNDitch masks that stank pussy odor in no time!
** hahahaha, stank
-- Television/Radio Advertisements ---
dy1 Ever felt like something was missing in your sex life? Try
ripping open a JizzNDitch.. ahh, thats the stuff. Sorry, ive
got to cut this commercial short - You see, i have some pussy
waiting for me.
** we couldnt get Jack Palance for this one, unfortunately.
Our advertising execs settled on Clint Eastwood. The first
cut of the advertisement was banned in 12 European countries.
mESSIAH with JizzNditch Jelly, even a crack in the wall feels
nice and warm
AcidJack Tired of pillows and those messy jars of spaghetti?
JizzNDitch now includes a preserved piece of pussy in every box!
Just throw it in the microwave and add JizzNDitch brand lubricant
and youre good to go!
** a major lawsuit immediately followed this endorsement apparently
female corpses were being disintered and exhumed from local cemeteries
all over the continental United States and Canada. Officials are quoted
as calling JnD Industries a pack of necrophiliac ghouls.
The US Supreme Court dismissed the attack on JnD due to lack of
evidence.
The only concrete lead the CIA had was a shovel with mHz
engraved in the handle.
The corpse transporation vehicle, the Megga-Hearse, is safely
tucked away from authorities in the JnD warehouse.
AcidJack JizzNDitch, when your legs just cant handle that long
walk to the toilet
** who flushes condoms, anyhow? just jizz, and ditch.
mESSIAH JizzNDitch NEGRO, for those meat packin black boys,
this condom stretches up to 2 square miles
mESSIAH JizzNDitch NUTSAQ PROTECTION tm for when its
hotnheavy, and your balls are slapping agains that pussy, NUTSAQ
Protection will give your nuts a steel and lead coating, lead incase
of pending nuclear strike just to be safe
** OUR COMPETITORS BOW DOWN:
dy1 Trojan CEO John Corian is quoted as saying When our stock
began to plummet, I realized our production team had drastically
underestimated the ability of a jizzed-in condom to be thrown away
casually. End quote.
** IN RECENT NEWS:
dy451 Messiah - apparently a JizzNDitch TOO THICK version
was produced for individuals who wish to endure painful
intercourse with Dianas corpse.
SAUCE00
19970928
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y R O N E
Well here i am..yet another thrilling month of tyrone...the big black nigger magof the ascii scene. I apologize too everyone about the tardyness of this releasebut hey..quit your bitching..its done..no code..just straight text...kinda like
vaginaby kHz. This month is one our better months for the mag, we have alot
of articles for the mag..i didnt get enough art..but what i have works so im
not complaining.
In other news this month..Necromancer has a girlfriend now..and yes..hell HAS
frozen over. Secondly, two people join the staff as monthly reviewers for tyronethese people are, Pariahof Fire and The Prodigyof Odelay. Also next month
the mag will be taking on more drastic changes as of our next release..more
details too follow.
And last, but not least thanks too everyone who did art for me this month, this
people include, Meatpod, Pariah, Mass Murderer, and Black Jack. thanks guys
I LOVE YOU GUYS!
And now...drum roll On too the mag!
- this is empty. Peace.
78
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P, 1 Editorials 88
8@yy@h,7 2 Interview with
7h,7 Black JackRemorse @gyh Cains Monthly ,g Packreviews P
Homosexual Ascii yyy @8
Kwest Ascii P
odelay Ascii P .,
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- Writer Pariah
This is mainly in response to The Upright Mans, such an elite alias
I -had- to spell it out article in Tyrone 2. First off, Im really glad
Tyrone is in stable hands once more, no offense intended but things usually
work best when in the hands of the person/people that created them. Now,
onto the article..
For the most part I agree completely with what Tum said, except for
some things.. Myself being one of the few full fledged anscii artists who
currently draws Ive heard alot of the excuses as to why anscii sucks, but
with time most of them dissapate. A lot of the people that criticized my art
for its color have either viewed it without color and recognized that its
a regular high quality ascii without the shocking colors or else learned
to accept, even appreciate it. I think the same goes for a lot of new styles
or methods in the art scene. You can complain that people dont like your
style because it doesnt resemble the norm, but the bottom line is, if youre
actually talented in the long end, it might take a month or a year people
will learn to appreciate what you draw. This is in a great part thanks
to the artists that push the limits and try drawing something different
regardless of what the demand is currently, what people like changes every
minute. Dont get me wrong, EVERYONE, except maybe that pimply discyple is
going to get some negative feedback from certain people, but that always
happens, people have different opinions. The art scene and its styles are
really like the music industry and the people who buy music, being very
brief here, there are about 3-4 genres of music, and hundreds of small genres
that branch off of them, think of those 3-4 main genres as 3-4 different
opinions, and those hundreds of smaller genres as people who draw that certain
style or people who support/appreciate it. Unfortunately some people
disregard colored ascii because they a try it once and arent successful,
colored ascii, like any medium isnt something you can pick up after only one
try or b because they dont like change. And while I respect everyones
opinion, a and b are pretty pathetic reasons.. Ascii, referring to grey
non-colored art made up of the ascii set has a lot of legends or greats
that have added to the respect it gets, but anscii has the same, msd, kHz,
everyone pushing it currently, etc.. and deserves the respect ascii has
gotten from the majority of the scene. To briefly make my point here, ascii
and anscii are in a way two seperate mediums, and everyone should respect
them as such.. once you get shaping/your basic style down trying to learn how
to color should be recognized as a good idea, not a bad one. Nothing against
ascii artists at all, were all part of the ASCII scene, and shouldnt hold
grudges against each other based on whether were colored.. err.. whether we
color our dollars or not. Also, colored ascii isnt for everyone, some people
are good at pushing the limits of ascii, and some are good at pushing the
limits of anscii.. one way isnt better than the other, they both can produce
some very nice looking art when done well. The only reason the focus of this
article is on colored ascii is because its obviously less popular than ascii
is, and without a few influences could very well not exist, that would be a
shame.. good artists need to push anscii and realize some of its advantages.
And to all the people that are currently doing that, sadly, the only two I
know of are Neilprodigy, Julesmeatpod and myself I salute you..
I dream of a day when all ascii artists can hold hands and beautifully arrange dollar signs or other ascii characters regardless of color
-- The Reverend, Dr. Pariah King pariah@breaks.for.alienz.org
P.S : As to what Tum wrote concerning advertising personal styles, if you have
an original style advertising it is normal.. original styles can
gradually become the base for new artists to rise up. Adding things to
your style is always a good thing, but sometimes thats really hard to
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- Writer Pariah
I had to write a 6 page essay on the individual and the team effort, and it
got me thinking.. If you take a look at the scene, specifically the ascii scene
practically everyone whos good is in at least 2 groups. In some cases it might
be because they support the cause of both groups, but in most cases its becausethey want to get their art to as many people as they can I should know, I do
this. This might not be the case if the ascii scene, like the ansi scene, had
several quality groups instead of 3 or 4. Take me for example..
I officially got in the scene in the summer of 96 when I joined rune, plain,
blade and cia.
In the fall of 96 I joined s0ap, left for acid!a, dualed with noname to releasemy colored asciis and then left acid!a
In the winter of 96 I joined eclipse and went solo with the group for about 3
months.
In the beginning of 97 I was in noname, joined rile, was in eclipse2after
cheeze left, created fat972 with firestorm and hajiit lasted about a week,
became fire!a coordinator and went solo with fire for 2 months, and joined
odelay.
In the summer of 97 I left noname, left rile, left odelaywell, it died and
joined remorse I went solo with remorse for about 2 months too, then I became
a permanent guest in kwest, and re-joined odelay after neil revived it.
Well, currently Im only officially in 2 groups, which is better than when
I was in 4-5 but thats not the point. Each time I joined another group
while I was already in one it was because I thought that other group could offerme something that I didnt get from the first group.. be it a fun enviroment,
laid back attitude, more respect from other asciists, etc.. For example,
currently Im in remorsea close group of people that is as stable as it gets
and arguably the best and odelaya more laid back group of quality artists fullof new and old talent. Both of these groups give me everything I need, with
remorse theres the seriousness of competing and with odelay theres the fun
laid back almost eclipse-ish attitude. Does being in 2 groups rip apart the
idea of competition in the ascii scene? I dont think so.. Compare the ascii
scene to the ansi scene, the ansi scene has ice, fire, echo, twilight, glue,
everglo, dark, and aweto name a few. The ascii scene has remorse, odelay,
and kwestIm only naming serious groups that have been around more than 2
months. With only 3 groups in one scene its only natural that talented artistsare going to want to be part of all of them. The answer to this problem lies
not in going solo with one group against your will and missing out on what the
other groups have to offer but in creating more stable/fun groups. If the ascii
scene had 10-15 groups like the ansi scene dualing/tri-grouping would be less
of a problem, there would be one group that fits what each artists wants, be
it a laid back attitude, a serious attitude, or a humorous approach to
everything. The fuck you my groups better than yours attitude has its
disadvantages, the scene friends you associate with would be controlled by
what group youre in and ascii would become more of a war ground than a place
to talk about the latest releases and the such.. Lately everyone seems to be
focusing more on two things that Im not a big fan of:
1. Youre all shitfaces, my group is better than yours!@ This is just stupid, Id rather see unity in the ascii scene than everyone seperated by the
groups theyre affiliated with.
2. Everyones criticizing each other already.. people are using personal
conflicts they have with certain artists/group leaders as an excuse to
criticize other peoples art. If you dont like someone, fine, you probably
have a good reason, but criticizing their art is just pathetic. Anyone who
has run a group successfully has accomplished something that deserves the
respect of everyone.
Basically all Im saying is that people should stop complaining, things
are only as bad as you percieve them and by saying the ascii scene is dead
all you do is turn away more people from drawing ascii/starting what could be a
good group/etc..
-- Pariah
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The scene of the future - by sargon.
Throughout my long, 8 month stay in the scene, Ive come to the point where I
call myself a legend, although nobody else does.. which is REALLY strange,
considering Ive been around for 8 months. Thats a long time.
Anyways, throughout my arduous stay, Ive seen trends come and go. Ive got
some predictions for where the scene will be in 6 months, or so. Some of them
are serious, others maybe not as serious, you can figure it out.
First off, recently, the flow of good artists into the scene seems to be
slowing down, and the flow of foreigners will be unstoppable. When I ran
serial, I had 3-4 apps a day, and at least 2-3 of those apps came from
isreal, sweden, finland, or some other nordic country. Oddly enough, at least
2-3 apps a day got rejected. You do the math. Although I refuse to name
certain artists, you can figure out some of the people Im talking about.
They join mediocre groups, with styles that are either:
A horrible
B styleripped
C both
For some reason, the mediocre groups release their work. Eventually though,
these groups will smarten up, and all of the foreigners will be outcast as
losers and freaks. i.e: aphro. What happens when a bunch of losers and
freaks get rejected from the mainstream society? in this case, society is
the scene. They unite. Proletarian power! So, this leads to my first
prediction, which is that in 6 months or so, there will be many local
groups, for scenes such as the isreali, swedish, or finnish scene. The fact
that the groups are local is an excuse for the group to be shitty, but they
always have the excuse that theyre the best group in isreal.
cough*libido*cough.
My second prediction, which is a more serious one, comes from the recent
emergence of styles of such artists as the prodigy, tek, discyples inverse
style, mass murderer, and others. They all use characters other than the
dollar sign. I know there are other artists like this, I just cant think of
them. It seems that everythings been done with dollar signs that can, so one
of the easiest ways to be original is to use characters other than the
dollar signs. Although the current artists using those styles are generally
considered good, the number will grow and grow, due to the emphasis in the
scene on originality. So, in conclusion, I think people will start to move
away from the dollar sign, not abandon it, but there will be lots of people
using other characters.
This next prediction, started with some comments I heard another person make.
I think it was discyple. He said eventually, with the growth of the scene,
peoples ascii will all start to look the same. Right now, you can clearly
see certain styles that have been copied, and styleripped, look at 3/4 of the
isreali artists, they all draw with this certain newschool style, thats easy
to do. Basically, people will continue to perfect curving methods, and each
time somebody finds a better way to curve, or shape, people will adopt the
method into their own style. I dont know if it will generally start to
become where everyones style becomes the same, but Im pretty sure that
shaping, rounding, shading, and coloring methods will be VERY similar. Just
look at how many people in the scene RIGHT NOW, even some respected artists,
use msds coloring style.
Right now, thats about all I can think of. thanks for listening.
1l, 1S1
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Sli
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massmkwest
tyrone
The NON- Trend, written by Black Jack
Alright. At the moment, school has just started... September is just start-
ing, and the ascii scene has gone back to its timeless loop of boring doodle.
Or has it? .. As of the late, packs have been popping up with new shit in
them.. new characters instead of the mostly used . Not only this, but
artists that used to do , are switching over..
AND THIS IS FUCKING PISSING ME OFF.
Listen up fuckups.. that non- is old. You bastards are following artists
who have been original, and done stuff like that since the start ie.
prodigy, massmurderer, tek, haji, etc . This non- shit is/was in the
odelay pack 10, the remorse pack 15 and even in the last serial pack.
Whats with this? .. Have we all lost our self respect? .. Why is everyone
doing this non- shit, and changing their style to the line stuff? Just
because a couple artists start it up, doesnt mean you have to.
Right now, your probally defending your little non- shit. Saying its the
new wave of ascii, and the future. BULLSHIT. the lines dont shade well,
and over all, makes the asciis look worse. Or mabey your saying how that
*SOME* people have to be original. Well, your right ... . SOME PEOPLE ARE
FUCKING ORIGINAL... like prodigy haji... but your not. Your just following
them, making ascii like them, and basically .. style ripping them.
So .. in conclusion .. Im rather pissed off... I would like some feedback
on this shit... please /msg me on irc blkjack .. or leave me a note on
g0at... or even email me find out the email yourself .
Blah.
A rather pissed off, Black Jack.
1l, 1S1
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massmkwest
tyrone
Scene Thing
by meatpod
Before I begin, Id like to say that this article is sort of a response
to the one by Sagramore, a piece that appeared in Tyrone 2. I dont know
Sagramore, so I mean him no offense by this piece. I do, however, disagree with
a few of the issues that he raised.
Anyway, lets begin. Like everyone has been at some point, I used to be
a little obnoxious kid who hung around in ansi and tried to get into the club
that the big boys were in. I hassled major artists who had no fucking idea who
I was they probably still dont, and I got banned a lot by ops who were
annoyed at my behavior. My art was lousy. I didnt even consider applying to a
group. Did this get me down? Yeah, sometimes it did. It didnt stop me from
pissing people off and getting banned, though.
Eventually, after a long chain of events that I dont feel like fully
exploring here, I wound up in one of the top two groups in the scene, Serial
I think that now, after Serial was disbanded, even the staunchest anti-Serial
Remorse members will acknowledge that we were pretty much neck and neck for a
long time. Having gone from an entry level position in the scene to being the
guy who has to turn people down when they apply to one of the top groups, I
think Im pretty well qualified to dispense with a few pieces of insight that
Ive picked up in no particular order:
1. Id like to say a few things about irc, since thats where a lot of scene
goings-on take place. First off, irc isnt fair. Some people are in
control, and some arent. You have to learn to accept that. You may
feel that the people who control the channel abuse their control. They
do, its true. Its too bad. It used to piss me off, but Ive learned
to relax about it. Which brings us to another point about irc.
2. Some people complain that ascii is getting to be another ansi. I dont
really see the problem with that. True, ansi has a certain infamy,
due to the relaxation of morals that some claim pervades the channel.
You have to realize, though, that this is irc, not the bible belt. Im
sure that if you have enough brains to be smart about computers, youd
be able to loosen up a bit. In addition, theres always the option of
going off and making your own channel if you dont like it. If the next
kHz is such a shrinking violet that he gets turned away by a bunch of
rowdy kids, tough noogies for him. That prospect doesnt really bother
me too much.
3. On the other hand, Id like to remind all of you prospective artists to
follow your hearts. Dont take bullshit from anybody, and say what you
think keep in mind people may not always agree with you. Some things
you have to deal with read: sit on it, and some you dont. You have
to learn to tell the difference, and no one can teach you. Its
something you have to come up with on your own. What this boils down to
is as follows: do what you feel is right not what you think you should
feel, what you DO feel.
4. I never used to understand why people werent really enthusiastic about me
drawing them something. Now I do. If you lack talent and I know you
can sure as fuck tell if you do, people arent going to be crazy about
your shit. You need to accept this. I try not to put down peoples
work, but I also dont appreciate being hassled when I deny someone
membership to a group. You will get better. You may have to settle for
a group of lesser calibre than Remorse or Serial on your way towards
scene stardom, if such a thing exists. On behalf of serial, though, I
feel compelled to mention that we often gave new artists a chance, even
if we didnt think they were up to par art-wise. Sometimes, having the
experience of being in a group can do a lot for the spirits of a
developing doodleboy.
5. How does it feel at the top or as close to the top as I am, personally?
Pretty much the same as it does at the bottom, except I know a bunch of
people by their first names. I feel essentially the same way about my
art, I still take the same pride in it. It feels good, too, when
people tell you they like what youve done, no matter how good you
think you are.
6. A quick way to get to the top? That doesnt exactly exist. To gain respect,
I would recommend that you keep quiet until youre pretty sure you know
the score, and then act humble. I dont know you -- if you get up in my
face, it doesnt help my opinion of you. Dont take things too
seriously, and dont give up.
All newbies eventually turn into the people they used to loathe, at
which point they realize they arent as bad as they thought theyd be.
Everybody gets their 15 minutes of fame Andy Warhol, and that includes you.
The scene is NOT a big deal -- its a hobby, and thats it except in the case
of VGA artists that go on to become professional graphic designers -- nothing
more, and you should treat it as such. The scene is ephemeral, nothing. Its
just a big exercise in bullshit. RELAX. If you dont agree with any of this,
fine. Its not my problem. Despite what you may think, this scene thing is an
open medium, so say whatever you like. Just be aware that nobody has ALL the
answers.
The scene brings people together in a way that nothing else is quite
able to. If youre lucky, youll make some great friends in the whole art and
competition process. With respects to that, Im very lucky, and I wish you the
same.
meatpod ex-serial ss 97, PROUD FUCKING DOODLEBOY
As with anything scene related, I feel obligated to write greets
brad and scott -- I love you guys. TRI forever.
john, mike, jeff, justin, and my
other first-name basis nigs -- HI GUYS!!!
josh and chris -- I couldnt do without my local nigs, guys. Peace.
everyone from serial has my respect.
everyone in remorse has my respect, even those of you who were... close-minded
at times.
if you didnt get a greet, chill, I still love you.
1l, 1S1
ilS
Sli
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l1S
massmkwest
tyrone
Group leaders/artists trying to make money through the scene
by
Aneurysm/Piko
note: excuse the crappy art and this article probably doesnt represent the
views of the staff and other writers of tyrone emag
ACID PRODUCTIONS
One day in 1992, when ansi had just started to be produced for bbses,
someone emerged with a group called acid. This would be the first ever group to
emerge and produce art in an orderly fashion, releasing monthly. This was a
decent thing to do, as it paved the way for other groups such as ice, blade, ciaetc. But recently, acid has been using its power to manipulate other artists
to change the archive format from zipa scene tradition to rar, and for what
reason.
But this is not the purpose of my article. The acid cap is a decent cap,
but think about it. Your walking down the street in your acid cap, and you see
a crack addict, and the cap says acid productions. A crack addict would think
that your from some wild drug mass production company, and proceeds to attack
you for your hat. artists rendition
crack addict: whoa man, you must be on acid man, i love that stuff
acidcap guy : no man, im just a doodleboy
crack addict: ill kill you man.. your a dead man.
acidcap guy : no!!!!!
Ok ok, now this might not exactly happen, but what exactly is the point
of spending 16us 22canadian for a hat that says acid on it. To meet other
artists? Next thing you know theyll be acid t-shirts, posters, porno mags,
mousepads, music cds, and Buy stock in acid productions!. Another example of
trying to manipulate artists to spend money would be to register aciddraw. What
do you get by registering aciddraw. Jump to dos? If you have windows95, you can
multitask to a msdos window. Aciddraw is a useful utility, but for 20 dollars,
i think we could go without registering.
Probably theyll make you pay to upload your pack to the acid archive,
and for 2 dollars you get a bright shiny coin that says acid on it 10 dollars
shipping of course.
CIA PRODUCTIONS
Rather than in the case of acid, cia has taken a more direct approach
of selling stickers. For the low price of 20, you get a hundred stickers if
your not a member, but if you are, you get it for the lower price of 15.
Think about it, 15 for a bunch of adhesive stickers with amusing pictures on
them. Still, there are about 30 members, and about 300 or more people in the
scene. So most people would have to pay 20 dollars. Plus shipping, its a hell
of a lot of money for a bunch of things that you probably wont know what to do
with in the end anyway.
SCENE CDROMS theres another one
This one is REALLY stupid. Rather than getting any merchandise, you
get 2 cdroms filled with artpacks from 1996. The Acid archive has all of these
packs and more, and its all for free for now. Why dish out 25 us 33 can
for a cdrom filled with old artpacks, demos, and other things that if you were
uptodate with the scene from that year, had a record of all the stuff that you
would have seen anyway. Plus it didnt have all of the artpacks anyway. For 25
dollars, you could get a box of 100 3
diskettes to backup all the packs from
that year that you acually wanted, not a bunch of groups that youve probably
never heard of, or that you wanted to read about.
ARTISTS SELLING ART
Some artists are really lazy, and need motivation to draw. Sometimes
its necessary to trade goods and services for other things. But lets think aboutthis for a minute. Most artists sell logos for about 2-10 dollars. Many artists
will draw you something for free, or trade services. For instance, logo for
logo, access on the board for logo, etc. Somemany boards dont last forever,
and the people who run them, if they are persistant, will gather up many logos
and possibly pics for their board.
Artists who sell a logo that they worked like 10 minutes on for 5 is
a pretty good rate. If they were consitant and sold about 10 logos a day, thats
about 30 dollars an hour. More than most professionals make. Sometimes if your
FAVORITE artist in the whole world who quit drawing and you begged him for art,
but he said the only way he would draw is for money. Now you shipped him out themoney, and it wasnt what you wanted piece was ugly.. and you wanted your
money back, i really doubt the artist would send you your money back after
putting effort into a piece.
What im trying to say is that many artists would draw you art for free,
rather than pumping in lots of money into one piece that you may not like after
it was finished. But if your desperate to buy some art, a decent way would be
a compo. For 10 dollars you could get lots of work for your board, lots of
variety, it would be worth it for the ten dollars rather than buying one logo
for ten dollars.
FINAL WORD
Drawing shouldnt cost money, it should be something that is done
mainly because you think its fun and allows you to meet other people who have
some of the same interests as you. if your that desperate to spend your money
on acid caps, and cia stickers, or if you really want to spend your money on
an ansi or an ascii that you may or may not like anyway. Or if you want to spendyour money on something that has the packs that you probably have on your hard-
drive if you kept up to date throughout the year, its probably better that you
didnt have money at all. Or you spent it on something worthwhile. These are MY
views, and may or may not represent the views of the other views of the tyrone
staff. aneurysm/piko out.
1l, 1S1
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Sli
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massmkwest
tyrone
- Interview with the one, the only Black Jack
IRC log started Tue Aug 5 08:19
*** Inviting blkjack to channel trip-hop
.x blkjack blkjack@*toronto-06.ican.net has joined channel trip-hop
blkjack we lagged?
.x topic change on trip-hop by pariahFAT : iNTERViEWING bLKj4CK
pariahFAT nope
blkjack ok
.x Mode change +o blkjack on channel trip-hop by: pariahFAT.
pariahFAT you ready?
blkjack yeah, a little pissed off, but ready
blkjack :
pariahFAT hehe..
blkjack I cant unrar the remorse pack
pariahFAT Okay, first tell us your name, age, other interests, etc..
blkjack alright, my name is Jeff, my age is 16, and I like basketball
hockey.
blkjack I live in Oakville, Ontario, Canada.
blkjack phear my canuckiness
pariahFAT okay.. what groups have you been in and about when/how did you get
in the scene?
pariahFAT hehe..
blkjack I got into the scene by ripping art from old oil asia packs...
I put the original authors name on it, and mixed the fonts around to spell out deadlock .. my board.
pariahFAT woah.. elite
blkjack A local guy Suicidal Lemming was the one to hook me up with the
boards the art.. etc.
blkjack I guess after ripping about 20 different artists.. I got the hang
of it, and started to draw by myself.
blkjack fonts of course
pariahFAT i remember him.. he ran that group shade
blkjack yeah! You remember him?. . Shade was my link to the scene
blkjack I was in Shade while I was on local art boards TLA, Toons
Town, etc
blkjack I did PCBoard mods.. :
pariahFAT yeah.. he got me to join back when c0rosive was up and stuff
pariahFAT hehe..
blkjack yeah .. that group was pretty badass.. if we didnt kill it, we
wouldve ruled in two months.
blkjack mhz even joined when he was everlast.
pariahFAT true.. well, what have been some of your influences during your
time in the scene?
blkjack hmm .. not really picists actually .. Ive rarely seen any art from
MSD or Killahertz... although mrkites work, and nine lives did inspire me.
But from that, I guess all those font cut pasting, gave me different styles
to look at...
blkjack Im talking 2-5 fonts a day. :
pariahFAT woah..
blkjack And I didnt release the fonts... understand that, and I didnt
sign my name ... I just used them for my board.
blkjack I did that font shit during the whole month of august /96
pariahFAT when did you start realizing you had pic sk1LLZ?
blkjack I dont really regret it either... except the fact that its sort
of ripping ..
blkjack well .. one day I was whipping this carnage card against the side
of my house, and I thought.. hey, mabey I could draw this.
pariahFAT I remember that ascii : you sent it to me on c0r
blkjack And I did... : .. I still have it... it was my first pic ever...
and non-color too imagine that.. I INFACT have done about 80 MORE color
pics in the past then non-color
blkjack did i?
pariahFAT yeah..
blkjack word... remember that first spawn one I did?
blkjack like .. everyone wanted to do a joint with me.
pariahFAT yep.. i think i still have it in my lync directory :
blkjack haha
pariahFAT a lot of people think youre one of the best pic artists currently
how would you rate yourself?
blkjack myself? .. I dunno .. I cant *really* rate myself, and I dont think Im the best. I mean, weve got new old, artists... like : Terrato, tum
axb, even mrkite : .. theres alot of talent in the scene.... I have no idea how to rate myself.. I guess Im alright.
blkjack I know Im missing some BIG picists in the scene currently Im
stupid .. so .. sorry to all those :
pariahFAT yeah.. there are a LOT of good pic guys.. gdr, axb, terrato, tum,
you, etc..
blkjack oh yeah .. gdr
blkjack SORRY GDR!
pariahFAT anyway.. i forgot to ask this before, what groups are you
currently in?
pariahFAT heh
blkjack Im in remorse.
blkjack :
blkjack thats it .. good ol remorse.
pariahFAT and whats the funnest group youve been in?
blkjack ohh .. the most fun group Ive been in.
blkjack lets see... Id have to say, hrmm .. echo.
blkjack echo was one of my first groups plain .. and its local.
blkjack It was really cool being in echo, and I give greets to watOr 4thy
for making it happen.
pariahFAT yeah.. echos elite..
blkjack werent you in echo?
blkjack echo!ascii ?
pariahFAT i was in plain in early 96 and echo at first
blkjack ok
pariahFAT then they nuked the ascii dept :
blkjack YEAH!
blkjack THOSE BASTARDS!
pariahFAT hehe
pariahFAT are there any groups youd like to be a part of in the future? or
you plan on sticking with rmrs?
blkjack I wanna guest in cia fuel at least once.. : .. I mean, the knight
napalm are like, SUPERCOOL... I also wanna hook up with odelay .. but
since I dont draw enough.. : .. you know.
pariahFAT yeah.. how many times do you draw in a month about?
blkjack now a days? .. one ascii .. : .. this month, if I get new material I could draw up to 7 pics... but .. If I dont .. Ill probally do the one Im half done at the moment.
pariahFAT what are the top 3 ascii groups in your opinion?
blkjack umm, lets see. 1 remorse, 2 kwest, 3 odelay
blkjack but ... odelay hasnt released yet
blkjack so .. well see
blkjack look for good things from odelay
pariahFAT aieght.. and who are the top 5 newschoolers picists/fontists in
blkjack betcha didnt expect soi
blkjack EH?
blkjack:ascii I have it
pariahFAT hehe
pariahFAT soi draws some elite pics
blkjack yeah
blkjack Ive seen like .. 2 pics from him
blkjack and i loved them
pariahFAT okay.. where do you think ascii is headed? in the last few months
its really boosted as a medium
blkjack true, I think ascii is still going strong.. I personally have no
idea where its headed.. I mean, in a month, what if irc died? .. or some shit..
that would fuck us over.
pariahFAT yeah.. the scene is sort of unstable..
pariahFAT anyway, in conclusion do you have any lasting greets/things youd
like to say?
blkjack well .. I could greet about 100 people.. : .. but Ill only greet
local people that I talk voice to :: dave, neil, craig, sean, raph, bob EH,
tim, jamie, and dan.
blkjack corinthian, nosanity, syntax, psyonide, prime.
blkjack prime is a new pic artists.
blkjack like .. REALLY new.
blkjack artist even
pariahFAT what group is he in?
blkjack hes in gemfire
blkjack this local group to me.
blkjack :
blkjack he just started drawing 2 weeks ago.
pariahFAT aieght.. well, good luck with rmrs and its been fun interviewing
you.
blkjack WORD!
blkjack alright, no problem :
** IRC log ended Tue Aug 5 08:56
1l, 1S1
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Sli
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lil,7
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--1i
l1S
massmkwest
tyrone
- Cains Corner
Whuddup, Cain here. Empty asked me to do a monthly column for Tyrone, I
gladly accepted. I, as does every other person in ascii have a message to
get out there, this is obviously a good way to do so.
To give you a swift background on myself, Ive been in the scene for
three years, Ive been through groups such as s0ap, basic, noname, the basic
revival, serial for 3 hours, cia, remorse, and now Kwest. Ive seen a lot, from
rags to riches you could say. Ive run three groupsdivisions.. Noname, Cia,
currently Kwest. I showed Polymorph how to do it, then he started kicking my
ass, same with Discyple hi guys!.. now Im just a disrespected veteran with a
cause.
Im going to touch on something which is the main drive of the scene
today, and the scene past Style, and the originality of the style. Yeah yeah,
yaddi yaddi, that Cain guy bitches and complains to much, fuck that. Ive just
read what Sargon has to say about style
Sargon-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Third off, Id like to comment on the state of the scene today. I think right
now, there is an emphasis on originality, but the methods people are taking
to find originality are in a sense, unoriginal. For example, people are
using different characters outside of the sign. Tek and the Prodigy started
that trend, and now there are 3944219 artists following it. I think a style
is just how your ascii looks, not how you draw your ascii. I mean, its come
down now, to where people think drawing with the sign isnt original
anymore. But I know people can do it, Ive seen people come in, and do it,
during serials life. axb, tum, compuman, meatpod, and others. So guys, be
original, but dont follow trendy originality.
Done-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Word, lets use some personal experience to back this up. Black Jack,
of Remorse Ascii, has said to me many a time You cant shape, shade, or curve
.. alright, fine.. lets check smore examples to contradict the little fucker
Discofunk ascii, released in kwest-------------------------------------------
yyyyyy
: yyy
: yyyyyy :
ll .,
yyyyyy
l
b,.....
: . yyyyyy 7 ..,4
7 SSyy..
l yyyy .
b. yyyy : ::: b. 4
7 , 4: b.4
,4y,..,4 yy .
,4
4 yyyyyyyy ...,d
. l b,.,d: Y
: Y7 S
yyyyyy
yyy
Done-------------------------------------------------------------------------
And the following is an ascii by myself from the same month. Something
to remember Black Jack always seems to support Discofunk, this is why he is
being used as an example.
Cain-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ahh, to be a s0ap son again.
7
, 7
,?
,7,
,?
, : 7 ,,
,l,,
S7, ,l
?7
?7
C
,7
?P
,P
,7
A 7
I,
?7
N7
,P
: K
7
?P ,
, l W
, E
l
,? S
l ,
7
,7
,S,P S
,7 ,,
?7
?P
S7
Done-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ok then, now this is not to say that I am better then Disco, nor that
me and my group Kwest are the best ascii group in the scene. But, if we refer
to Black Jacks comment of You cant shape, shade, or curve .. Heh, Id like
to know what you say to anyone whos style doesnt require outrageous curves, a
massive amount of shading, and extreme shaping. And, if we look at the whole
scheme of things, who the hell is Black Jack to judge a font artist? Ill admit
my style is lacking at the moment, simply because Im 2 months out of practice
though, not because I cant Shape, Shade, or curve. Whatever, Black Jack, get
off me.
I fully support Sargons comment I think style, is just how the ascii
looks:: Wordemonup Brad. So, in a half state of closing, dont listen to the
goofballs that judge your ascii, half the time most of them dont know what the
fuck theyre talking about, refer to Black Jack as The Flaming 12 year old,
and look forward to Kwests 6th release, it should be phat. Last off, grab a
style, dont be afraid to rub shit in someones face, dont be afraid to be you
when it comes to ascii.. and when goofs like Black Jack come around talking
bullshit, ignore him. Draw ascii for what it is to YOU, not for what it is to
everyone else.
- Cain-ONE, out.
1l, 1S1
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lil,7
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massmkwest
tyrone
Homo Ascii review
short and sweet - we own you.
CLIT-63.ZIP reviewed by Pariah and Prodigy
CM-CYA.ASC par - now a days a lot of asciists are starting to use
different characters in ALL of their asciis only
because other people are doing it. Theres a fine line
seperating the originators neil, tek, pat, etc..,
those just experimenting and those doing something to
try and fit in. Luckily compuman has been drawing like
this since when it wasnt popular, and this logo/pic
is yet another sweet compuman ascii. 8
prod - uh.. yeah, justin. i dont know this guy, honest. 7
DY-*.*.ANS par - amazing.. discyple does it all 10
prod - CRAB. ASCII BLOWJOB. BIRD. JEN. AMAZING 10
MP-*.*.ANS par - everyone else really liked meatpods stuff this month
except me. its just too scattered for my liking. 7
prod - Justins been acting strange this month. I think its
due to him taking that bottle of asprin he found. 9
SAR-*.*.ASC par - sargon stays true to his regular logo style with some
added twists. the pics excluding the rip are really
good too. 9
prod - SARGON SUCKS, AND HE IS GAY. GAY GAY GAY.
but I suppose his ascii is tolerable. 8
TRI-COCK.ASCpar - cALL gUINESS, iTZ tHE wORLDZ lONGEST pENIS!@ -
prod - i wish my penis was that long. oh yeah, IT IS. -
US-TA.ASC par - incredible.. excluding the shaping on the top of the
forehead the pic is excellent and nahals logo is
fucking massive. 10
prod - justin forgot to tack the prod part on, so I got
confused and it took me 2 hours to figure out what was
going on. Anyway, Id wager this is probably one of the
best pics ive seen from brad in a while. 8
Pariahs comments - The past two Homoaka Clit releases prove that a group withno intentions of competing can still attract quality asciists and release
high quality packs. I still think that Sargon will start a competitive group up
any time now, but in the meantime Homo packs are a humorous alternative to the
seriousness of other competitive groups.
Prodigys comments - I was supposed to be in this pack, but I wasnt. Therefore
everyone in Clit should get colon cancer. Apart from that, the pack was proof
that brad is the ascii scenes puppet master. The texts not reviewed were
hilarious, and I almost wet myself laughing. Good work, ladies.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------People tend to get riled up when they see a review that doesnt concur with whatthey think, so speaking for Neil and myself Im going to briefly explain how
you should interpret our reviews. First off, we do our best to not carry ANY
personal grudges when reviewing asciis, this means if one of us or both of us
give you a low numerical rating and/or comment its because we just didnt like
your asciis. Secondly, I like to think of these reviews as being pretty damn
fair, were not brutal and if you DO get a low numerical rating and/or comment
well do our best to explain why, not just say this sucks 2. Also, use
your common sense. Chances are a lot of the things we might notice are things
that other people including you, the artist wouldnt notice.. Unless you get
below a 7 when you average BOTH reviewers numerical ratings you shouldnt be
offended in any way. The whole concept behind having two VERY DIFFERENT
reviewers is to show how much our opinions differ. Thats pretty much it, if
you have any feedback please send it to pariah@alienz.org or dot@cybersolutions.net.
1-4 below average 5-6 average 7-8 above average 9-10 perfector close
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- Kwest Ascii
s1 / . -----/
The 5th Kwestion?
5THKWST.ZIP reviewed by Pariah and Prodigy
AXB-KWST.ASCpar - this ones a little too blocky 7 prod - you take coloured ascii a little too literally. 6BIO-*.*.ASC par - lots of great oldschools from roger this month - prod - good, good. CLUSTER THEM. -CN-*.*.ASC par - cains usual style, nice and funky.. 7 prod - these arent very good. PLEASE, DO SOMETHING NEW. 5DY-KLITE.ASCpar - a nice inverted logo from discyple 9 prod - absolutely fucking trippy. i dig it, scott. 9H4-KWST3.ASCpar - a really nice logo from pat, back to the lettering style9 prod - wackyhajitstyleez. keep it up, pat. 8IS-BYE.ASC par - this is more of a farewell than an ascii its sad to see
risu leave, hell be missed..
prod - what the hell? justin ORIGINALLY voided out my part, i
guess in the interests of saying bye in his own little
way. Well, let me tell you... I NEVER liked Risus stuff.
I could draw 300 asciis a month at Risu quality. BUT I
WONT, CAUSE HES NO GOOD. Bye Risu!
M-KLEENX.TXTpar - maybe im not viewing this right, it looks too scattered- prod - fiiine oldschools from the midniiight judge. -MA-ONEL.ASC par - another nicely drawn massm logo 8 prod - John... give it up. 6MH-AXSB.ASC par - too spread out for me.. - prod - MONSTER OLDSCHOOL! Ace is the best oldschooler around -MT-KWEST.ASCpar - pretty nice.. 7 prod - Not bad, not bad at all. That you, Mike? 7PM-KWURG.ASCpar - rough on the shaping, but its nice to see poly back 7 prod - POLYMORPH IS THE BEST ASCII ARTIST IN THE SCENE, OR ANY
SCENE. Bow down. This guy has more originality than Id
ever hope to have. Straight fucking ascii. Its wicked.10SAR-DIS2.ASCpar - another nice compact ascii from sargon.. 8 prod - you bash black jack for logos like this, brad. 6SD-TUT.ASC par - this is as good as it is funny, nice bubble style.. 8 prod - I would trade my thumb to get you in Odelay. 9TK-KWEST.ASCpar - tek has found a really nice yet unique logo style 8 prod - jason, my boy. this is another fine ascii. cool S 7
Pariahs comments - this pack is smaller than expected, but still full of art
from most of the big names that have been with kwest for awhile.
Prodigys comments - What a surprise, the original members of kwest make the
pack save cain while the latter members pull it down. BUT POLYMORPHS ONE
LOGO MAKES UP FOR IT.
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- Odelay Ascii
ODELAY PACK 10. ITS ON LIKE DONKEY KONG
qp
777b.477
b. 4
qp
qp
b.4
yy
qp
ODELAY
l888888: l
SSllll
l.
***sssl.
l llllll
iiiyy llllllyy
i iiiiii
iiiiiiiii:
..... : ................ ...... haji.
ODELAY10.ZIP reviewed by Pariah and Arrogance!
2N-*.*.ASC par - nicely styled stuff from s2n. -
aCk! - Very purdy. Wasnt terribly wild about 2N-HOS.ASC. -
5Q-*.*.ASC par - looks a little like necroms stuff. -
aCk! - Squish Bomb! -
74-EZ.ASC par - an abstract inverted ascii, I like : 8
aCk! - Originality! I like! -
aCk! - Originality! I like! -
BIO-*.*.ASC par - once again, no dissapointments.. good stuff from r0ger -
aCk! - Little orphan Bio has a very nice style.-
DS-COLLI.ASCpar - dead soul has gotten a lot better at logos.. 7
aCk! - Most of the logos were excellent.-
EG-HWX2.ASC par - evil Genius isnt that bad at oldschool :-
aCk! - Odd. I like the center ascii.-
EMP-*.*.ASC par - these asciis are amazingly smooth..8
aCk! - Empower? WHERE THE HELL DID HE COME FROM? WHY IS-
HE SO FUCKING GOOD?!?
GV-BM!.ASC par - i dunno, i just dont like this.. -
aCk! - I like grooves style. And his handle is cool.-
H4-*.*.ASC par - unique character choice and smooth shapes n34T9
aCk! - Haji is the lord and savior of ascii art.
KO-*.*.ASC par - some of the most creative toon/anime ive ever seen 9
aCk! - Konami racks the block, hardk0re.
MA-ODEL.ASC par - another nice massm logo.. 8
aCk! - Massies fade style rocks me hard.-
MJ-ODE10.ASCpar - mjay has a nice compact style -
aCk! - Damn. Its too short. I wanted more art@!-
MM-*.*.ASC par - nice oldschools and a creative pic -
aCk! - Quite grewvy. I like this guys style. Very eye-
pleasing.
NS-TLC.ASC par - a little too spread out for me..6
aCk! - Nos is fuckin-a excellent!-
PAR-PB.ASC n/a -
aCk! - Very pretty. I enjoyed it.-
PR-*.*.ASC par - VERY nice.. especially PR-JUST and PR-TRB 10
aCk! - Neil is the man of the hour. His shit rules.-
SAR-MONK.ASCpar - nice compact newschool from sargon.8
aCk! - Sargon consistantly produces fun stuff.
SMP-*.*.ASC par - i liked the pic, but vomit isnt really a logo style 6
aCk! - Enjoyable and humorous. All in all, a very sexy pic. -
TK-*.*.ASC par - more creative newschool from an odelay artist 8
aCk! - Tek is one of my favorite artists. His shit is amazing-
TUM-ODEL.ASCpar - another great pic from tum, the logo is pretty nice too9
aCk! - TUM Ruler of ASCIi pic art. YEAH!-
US-JUST.ASC par - okay shaping but the colored s go against it..-
aCk! - I find this to be a freakin cool ascii. -
US-ODELX.ASCpar - yAY!@ sPEARS bACK!@ however this is a little basic 7
aCk! - I luph IT! SHPEUH RULES!!!-
US-STORT.ASCpar - weirder than the others, but still a solid abstract pic8
aCk! - I like this kinda stuff. Its great! -
Pariahs comments - Another great pack from the odelay crew, slightly better
than the previous one. It looks like odelays around to stay this
time.
Arrogances comments - I love this pack. I do not have one negative comment
about it. Each Odelay artist has at least one distinctive style, and
they use it well. Great pack, guys. You rule. Notice that I do not
number grade. I give compliments as much as possible, and suggest
improvements when necessary.
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- Biogenesis and his toys.
This is a tight joke to pull on your friends. Now, do what I say children.
Do the actions as i call them. You better go to the bathroom now, before
its to late. Hold out three fingers, ones a blonde, another a brunette,
and a red head. Lick the first one. Did it feel like the first time you
had sex? Usually no so continue. Lick the secound one. Did it feel like
the first time you had sex? Usually no so continue. Lick the Third one.
Did it feel like the first time you had sex? Usually no so continue.
Jesus, you must have had a good first fuck. Now place all your fingers in
a fist, and shake em all up. Did it feel like the first time you had sex?
Brought to you by biOgenesis, supporting asciis JND condoms. Oh, and
if that was not funny enough for you, I would like to say this, get
prepared: Sargon There we are, now heres some quotes. sargon but, i
never had sex before tk man, i need to be laid. nOk- i used to make
holes in my matress, for pleasure and stuff. hotgirl i just fingered my
self, u r a good fuck. G0AT YOUR ALL OWNED BY EMPTY
serial2n is gone
*. out chasing jews - since *9:24 pm est empty Your my doll rock and
roll, touch me there hanky panky
Hi empty, mrkite!
biOgenesis.
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- WindRider The Intern tells all
Dont make me send you to the office.
I havent had to say that yet, but it could happen in the near future.
My name is WindRider. I am a teacher. Well, more like an intern, but
that isnt the point. I am or once was, depending upon how you decide
participation a part of Remorse, Quad-P, and PiPE!lit or however its
spelled.
Did I mention that my students are all between ages 12 and 14?
I shouldnt even go into the ways that being a teacher of girlies
that age can turn a 25 year old guy into a deviant. If you want to know,
catch me on irc and ask me. Im likely to go into a long ramble about
Grade 9 chicks.
In recent weeks, people have asked me what if some artscene guy is in
one of your classes? Frankly, I dont give a rats ass. Im there as
part of my university education, and nothing is going to stand in the way
of that. I am the tacher, they are the student. But that doesnt seem to
be much of a problem, not many people in the sleepy little town im
interning at are actually hooked up. This the artscene stuff has
nothing to do with real life. I havent really had time over the last
while to contribute to groups, but I will when and if I can.
In writing this pointless little tirade for empty and all the boys of
Tyrone, Im hoping to signal to all of us that Im not about to drift off
into some abyss. I finish this part of the academic year on December 19,
after which you can expect to see me involved up to my big old flabby ass
sooner than you may think.
Yes, I know. Youre scared that will actually happen. So am I, but
for different reasons. So until the next issue of Tyrone which should be
sometime around March 1998 if things keep up. h0h0h0, I know youll all
miss me more than mere words can state. But that doesnt mean you
shouldnt try.
Ill catch you later,
WindRider rmrs1981
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- Why we own you.
How did the Wu-Trank! Clan own you?
by Fahrenheit / Remorse / Katharsis / EL8 / Koredump / Wu-Trank!
By now you have all heard of the most phearocious clan known
throughout the darkest corners of IRC. The Wu-Trank! clan. Why do we own
you? We have been around s0n, we know respect. We know who to give it to
and why. We know everything about you. We know your name, where you live,
we know how many times you jack off a day looking at our asciis. What we
dont know is, why we have let you live. Does it sound like I have a God
complex? Good. I do. We own you, s0n. You have the right to phear now.
One day, in an IRC channel far, far away. Two loced out ascii
drawers corroborated on the ultimate 1-2 to pull on the scene. We will
start a new way to monopolize the scene. A private crew solely built for
the idea to bring together the best oldschool ascii drawers there are into
one unifying clique. The other ninja agreed, that ninja was Hiro
Protagonist. The other ninja, that was me.
We knew exactly who we would honor by asking to join this most
elite tribe. We were on a mission. An IRC mission. Seek out the best
oldschool ascii drawers we knew and get them in. A quick hop-and-a-leap
later we were in ansi. We got Enigmatic, Whodini, and Cypherhex up in it
with the quickness. Whodini had to speak his piece though, This group is
so elite, we must keep it to ourselves, if anyone finds out about us it
might cause discomfort in Trank!. We must let it marinate for a bit.
Whodini was smart. He knew the sheer eliteness of Wu-Trank! would scare
the rest of the drawers off. We had to be diskreet ninjaz.
Due to a leak in the clan, news quickly got out. People swarmed to
us to try to get in to the inner-circle. We all told them to lick our
nutsax. We were too elite for them. They were *SCARED*. My bezt lover
ewheat was newschool drawer. I love him so much I bent the rules. He was
in. All of a sudden, ewheat was no longer an ansi drawer, he devoted his
time to monopolizing the ascii scene. Back in the day, the current ascii
ran ansi. We had complete control over all the ansi dewdlers too. And
life was good.
Further down the spiral, we got more recruits as they came back.
First Omicron joined, then Ack, and then our good friend Necromancer. We
all still consist of the clan known as Wu-Trank!. And you know what else?
We still own you.
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- G0AT Speaks
Hello. My name is g0at. Ive been the ascii bot for a really long time
now, and over the history of my watching the channel, Ive seen lots of
people come and go. First off, I really dont understand this whole
ascii concept. What is it? I mean, people talk about some group, and
scene, and doodle, remorse, odelay, pics, fonts, I mean
really, what is all this jargon you strange beings talk of? I read this
skills mag once, and all I saw was a bunch of and / and - characters,
thats really weird, and there was some gangster guy screaming about
killuminati and bombfirst. Ive even downloaded some of these ascii
packs, which I assume is a collection of these ascii things you humans
talk of. I tried to view the file in several ways..
edit rmrs-14.zip
type rmrs-14.zip
I even tried renaming it to a batch file, and running the batch file, but
it made my computer spit out a bunch of junk, and it went down. Thats
why I wasnt on ascii for a while. Some D0NKEY wannabe motherfucker was
sitting in my channel. Can you BELIEVE that? A poser, trying to be me, on
MY turf. People get shot for that, you know. And have you seen D0NKEY
since then? No. You do the math.
Anyhow, back to this ascii stuff. What is odelay? Isnt that an album
by beck? Does that mean beck makes ascii too? I fail to see the
connection between this ascii stuff, and music.
One thing I could actually look at was a colly, although I dont think
colly is a synonym for ascii, when I edited it, it showed a bunch
more of those -, /, , and other characters. Does that mean skills
mag is a colly? Hmm, Im starting to understand this. But why isnt it
called skills colly, or skills colly magazine.
Well anyways, if one of you people wants to write me and explain this
ascii stuff, mail g0at@hazir.tapu.kx. Next time Ill write some more
about my ascii scene trek.
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- A word from Remorse Ascii
Remorse Update
Omicron81
------------- History
Well, as far as new shit goes on the Remorse Front, theres not a
whole lot new that I can think of off the top of my head. Weve released
14 packs, 9 of those since our reincarnation, and they all kick ass. Even
the first ones kick ass. I know you may be saying oh my god you are dumb,
the first remorse packs from 1994-1995 suck balls. Well that is untrue.
They rocked you, they rocked your mom, they rocked your dog and they rocked
your fat sister. We helped pioneer this scene that pMk and tinyz kicked off,
and those are historical treasures that represent the beginning, the end,
the everything of the IBM Ascii scene.
------------- Joining
Furthermore, remorse was more than a group back then, it was a clique.
Not like the Nasty Boy Clique arizona rap group, or even the phunk junkeez,
but a tightly knit group of assholes who liked to draw ascii and piss off
people in ansi by taking it over almost daily. Remorse still remains a
strong group of individuals. Not nearly as loyal as the original set of
members, but still we kick ass. If you want to become part of this group,
this fraternity or brotherhood of ascii masters, then all you need to do is
obtain a copy of REMORSE.APP from Omicron me, Whodini, Acidjack, Empty,
mHz, or Necromancer. Once you have filled out this application and included
some pieces of your best work, you should go ahead and mail it to
whodini@acid.org with a Carbon Copy to kaleidas@pacbell.net. All we ask of
our members is loyality. From there you are free to go ahead and dominate the
ascii scene in any way you see fit.
------------ Quake Clan Clan!remorse
In other news that might also be of interest to applying artists,
remorse now has a quake clan that any remorse member may join if he wishes to
participate. A side note for this tho, if you dont play as a team and dont
contribute to helping the clan, we will probably kick you out. Right now the
clan members all contribute and practice regularly, which is expected if you
want to be in the clan. Oh, and if you wish to join the clan and need a copy
of quake, quakeworld, and/or team fotress, contact omicron or empty and we
will give you access to the private Clan!Remorse ftp site. ** If you wish to
join up, email empty@fastlane.net or omi@breaks.for.alienz.org, or send a
G0AT note to Empty.
------------ Response to the homosexual ascii pack
Well what can i say about this ascii pack? Have we not become
accustomed to such childish gayity from Sargon? The only good artist in the
whole pack is Discyple. And the Remorse logo next to a Swastika was not
appreciated by anyone in remorse. We never have and never will be associated
with the National Socialist Party.
omicron
omi@breaks.for.alienz.org
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- Quotes and more quotes
blkjack drax got beaten up, then anal raped by a gang of 68 year old men -
drAx blkjack, no, thats impossible-
blkjack not in sweden
drax and this bullshit about killing bird eating spiders, we have a nice
place for those, and other small animals ..
* drAx is gone *time to smoke some DICK! - email *draxfood@hotmail.com
- since *9:12 am EST
drAx You should make me an own quote thingey, like mcanal and stuff ..
drAx blkjack hey thats enough .. your hurting my feelings sniff
*** empty changes topic to well drax is just gay.
drAx I tried to install linux on your shell .. I *think* I might have
messed something up!
cash Mrsbill is mrbill@did.dogs.with.sandpapers.condoms.for.an.oline.com
blkjack well, if i had a million dollars, Id goto world vision sponsor
about .. umm .. 100 kids. Yeah, thatd be cool.. then I could play god!
sargon dude, its my dick ..
empty sargon: dude..show it too someone who cares..like Tg..or mHz
biogen If I do, you wont respect me! stammered the gorgeous Congressmans page as the corpulent dirty old man defiled her muscular ear lobes and crammed his humongous candlestick into her dusty and cobwebby furrow.
sargon WHATS UP WITH THAT DICK? .. sargon IS IT BRONZE?
biogen this is hard to say and stuff, but sometimes i wonder, when will my
dad buy me a freakin computer? i heard the internet has some wild stuff and
shit, ahwell. fuckit dad.
drAx biogen i want tew connect tew your board, and bitchX from it
vagina crazycat, is it true? i heard you broke your neck so you ..
could suck your own dick.
Shypht Serial2n: I try to be lame.. its my goal in life ya know?
wzombie Speaking of hanson, I think theyve got STANIC messages in their
music.. but you gotta play it forwards to hear them..:
dngrmouse meltdwn: your fucking IQ is less than your penis size.
iq fucking 2, you penis being 3
nosane the only black show i watch is cops.
ewheat The cops in Cops treat the black people like shit... but thats O.K.
drAx ahhh, what a beautiful day, i think ill just beat the shit outta
someone and take their money
mSO- thats my personal opinion --
oMi yer personal opinion was not accepted, please try it again
cr4sh S+Z crash : crash@your.penile.length.is.insufficient.for.python.net Crash
blkjack martz did any fine greece citizens rape you there? ..
or was your anal hole ALWAYS this wide?
serial2n drax knows alll about jerking off. --
drAx yah, i know everything there is tew know --
drAx im an expert on jerking
drAx Thats it , Thats all?, vAN dAMN!@, what happened, what happened tew
the pimps? what happened tew the guns? .. where is all the crackword-beep--
.. GARBAGE?!2?@
drAx AHhh, what a fucking great day, i think ill go tew the jungle and be
a fucking dick-head!@
drAx I wonder why i feel so good, could it be the music? could it be the
weather? or is it the just the fact that i just eat everybody damnit, life
is grand, life is great, i think ill have myself a cheap date, some girl i
could take to mcdonalds, tew all you suckers out there, kiss off!@
prodigy KARMA POLICE, ARREST THIS MAN. HE TALKS IN MATHS,
HE BUZZES LIKE A FRIDGE. HES LIKE A DETUNED RADIO.
prodigy KARMA POLICE, AREST THIS GIRL. HER HITLER HAIRDO IS MAKING ME
FEEL ILL. AND WE HAVE CRASHED HER PARTY.
soil HELLO I CAN DO SOME ASK KEY BUT MY MOTHER SAIS THAT IT IS REAL GOOD
drAx infect got so horny he had tew disconnect and masturbate with my pic!@
* hajimatic is away, toilet - sick from taco bell log:ON email:not-set-yet
drAx The moment i wake-up, me gonno put on some make-up.
drAx im a barbie girl, in a barbie world
seismic in a barbie world, wrapped in plastic, its fantasic.
imagination, life is your creaton
nnomatic who cares, i dont mean shit in the scene any more, heh.
im just here for the anal
*** drAx was kicked by nnomatic ultra-super-mega gay
NECRONITE WILL KILL YOUR DOG.irc nK
crEEd: current netsplit from irc.ascii.is.boring *.im.gonna.slip.com
*** nMANCEr changes topic to IF YOU HAVE ANY COMPLAINTS ABOUT OPS,
EMAIL NECROM@REMORSE.ORG
necronite ive been banning people since before irc was invented
nMANCEr Something crawled OUT of my ass this morning. It was brown,
and had no legs. I think it was a snake.
shroom its really lame having 2 groups, or three, remorse is a damn
monopoly :
prodigy ASCII IS A HAVEN... FOR RACIAL DISCRIMINATION! HIP HIP HOORAY!
HIP HIP HOORAY! HIP HIP HOORAY!
vermin13 ANAL SATISFACTION, THE NATURAL WAY
prodigy JOIN ODELAY OR I BRING BACK HORRORCORE RAP
empty d00d..if i had a million dollars i wouldnt waste it on some kids..
id go by some 16 year old whores..
empty -fuckbunny- You have 6 notes waiting on fuckbunny. --
empty i think hes trying too tell me something --
empty but what..i dont know
empty Think about it...if everything was the way it was on irc the way it
is outside, youd walk outside and instead of drive by shootings there would
be drive by uNFings and youd see guys fucking other guys in the ear and
shit, and youd see thousands of people fucking g0ats....
*** empty changes topic to If you arent in remorse, you are owned
*** compuman- changes topic to AsciiGuy anyone here do ascii?
infect cock is the most common word in ascii nowadays..heh..
compuman- the most common phrase in here would have to be Ban sargon!
empty You know, demi more did a new movie...its called A Few good Hags
*** empty changes topic to New macaroni and cheese with 95 more gay in it
-empty- wallops:ascii i know the best way too get a quick high.. ---
-empty- wallops:ascii ban sargon and make him bitch and whine too get back in..
its so fucking halarious
*** sargon was kicked by empty .:hamsteR. x- pointless ban
empty sargon im gay ---
empty a quote that is true but hasnt been said
serial2n well this is what i though before seeing sargons pics. this.
brad sitting on the fence, his straw hat on, with a stick of straw comming
out of his mouth, overalls, and a pich fork in his left hand and his right
in the yEEEHHH HAW movement.
GiZmO Hi I am looking for a ascii picture of a maraguana leaf
sargon Ajack: Uhm, I dont run a mag - blkjack sargon dump... -
sargon oh yeah
sargon My name is Mussolini.
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- And last but not least, a word from our sponser - JND
THE JIZZ AND DITCH SAGA
One sunny wednesday afternoon this summer, I found myself walking into
an anonymous video rental outlet. Upon entry to the store, I jammed
my hand into my pants pocket to retrieve car keys. I felt a plastic wrapper,
and thought to myself I dont recall buying gum. It turns out, in fact,
that this was an empty condom wrapper. I was shocked and revolted.
I promply exited the store, disposed of the wrapper in question, and
continued home, to relay the story to friends on IRC, wash my hands,
and try to formulate theorems about this miraculous appearance.
It was late, and only a scant few english-speaking
residents were vocal in ascii. Among them were pimps Messiah,
Ack, and Omicron. I promptly relayed the story, much to
everyones amazement. Soon enough, Messiah proposed that
damn.. someone just jizzed, and ditched it.
It was a unanimous opinion that a condom capable of easily
facilitating post-jizz disposal was truly a breakthrough.
The proposed condom prototype was tentatively named JizzNDitch.
The rest is legend...
Slogans and JizzNDitchc SPECIALTY Brand Condoms:
AcidJack I want a condom that says Hey bitch, I got shit to do,
thats why I trust JizzNditch
AcidJack JizzNDitch gives me the freedom to go places and not
worry about some bitch feeling detached.
mESSIAH jizznditch. condom of the 21st century
mESSIAH you dont take it off, it ditches itself
Kel7har you can have you newborn baby get an permanent
jizznditch condom attached at the low price of 19.95 shiping
and surgery not included
** uhh.. this one might not make it into our projected
marketing scheme.. you crazy Swede.
AcidJack JizzNDitch brand condoms! Try NEW JizzNDitch Cock
Cleaning variety!
** post-coital cock cleaning. now theres an idea.. no
more jizzy dick sticking to your boxer shorts.
Kel7har we also have a chistian version of the JizzNDitch
called Jizz with jesus and have crosses and the bible writen on it.
** main area of distribution: Utah.
Kel7har JizzNDitch. You have never enjoyed a hooker better.
AcidJack for that great-sex feeling withOUT the bitch sleeping
in your bed, try JizzNDitch!
mESSIAH JizznDitch NARROW TM for dicks that arent that
meaty
Kel7har JizzNDitch Hardon - For people with problem getting it
up. The condom contains small metal bars and a power-pump that
chokes your dick, disableing blood to get out.
** ouch!
AcidJack Do you hate that dirty dick feeling after sex? Does
your bitch seem to fall asleep when its time to clean cock? Try
our new suction brand JizzNDitch condoms!
** suction acoutrements now synergistically blended with the
cock-cleaning variety
Kel7har JizzNDitch powerengine. lay back and let the condom
take care of your local whore.
dy1 JizzNDitch JIZZBAG For men with a tendency towards
abnormally large ejaculation
AcidJack jizznditch FEMALE condoms. girl, sometimes you just
wanna cum and leave a brutha with a hard, cold cock
** we have already signed a deal with Tommy Hilfiger to
distribute a JnD FEMALE with every Tommy Girl purchase
at major department stores.
mESSIAH JizzNDitch Flavors tm we come in baloney, sausage,
minty fresh, and for the lesbians, vaginal flavor addon pack
** vaginal addon pack sales skyrocketed last week, with the
revolutionary marketing pitch Hey, tastes like vagina!
Retailers in the Arizona region report no sales.
mESSIAH JizzNDitch NOWOMAN tm condom. hey, who needs a
woman when ive got my jizznditch
** prototypes were tested for years by blkjack.
fortunately, his idea for having a washable claire danes tattoo
on the inner lining of the condom did not pass by our RD boys.
mESSIAH JizzNDitch : the only condom that takes advantage of
risctm mmxtm technology, by making it seem like the pussy is
better than it really is
mESSIAH dy1 yeah, but we shouldnt limit the market just to
shallow men
dy1 messiah - thats true, lets invent a JizzNDitch SENSITIVE
mESSIAH JizzNDitch Sensitive : When you just HAVE to bring
her to orgasm
AcidJack for men who have places to go, but still want to give
pleasure
Kel7har JizzNDitch ANIMAL - For the sheep in you.
** obviously, our Swedish market has special needs to be catered to.
YOU CRAZY SWEDE.
mESSIAH JizzNDitch SMOKERS EDITION, takes care of that after
jizz nicotine we all crave
dy1 why not just line the inside of the JND with Nicoderm patches?
dy1 JizzNDitch MASTURBATION EDITION - When you just dont want
to wipe up your mess with an athletic sock
** once again, tested extensively by blkjack
AcidJack Take it from me, Acid Jack of ACiD/Remorse fame
JizzNDitch brand condoms are the best thing you can do to improve
your sex life
** WE EVEN HAVE CELEBRITY ENDORSEMENT.
mESSIAH JizzNDitch MILITARY, top secret, this condom uses the
latest in radar dampening technology so she never knows quite when
you went in.
AcidJack Do you smell something? Dont worry! New SCENTED
JizzNDitch masks that stank pussy odor in no time!
** hahahaha, stank
-- Television/Radio Advertisements ---
dy1 Ever felt like something was missing in your sex life? Try
ripping open a JizzNDitch.. ahh, thats the stuff. Sorry, ive
got to cut this commercial short - You see, i have some pussy
waiting for me.
** we couldnt get Jack Palance for this one, unfortunately.
Our advertising execs settled on Clint Eastwood. The first
cut of the advertisement was banned in 12 European countries.
mESSIAH with JizzNditch Jelly, even a crack in the wall feels
nice and warm
AcidJack Tired of pillows and those messy jars of spaghetti?
JizzNDitch now includes a preserved piece of pussy in every box!
Just throw it in the microwave and add JizzNDitch brand lubricant
and youre good to go!
** a major lawsuit immediately followed this endorsement apparently
female corpses were being disintered and exhumed from local cemeteries
all over the continental United States and Canada. Officials are quoted
as calling JnD Industries a pack of necrophiliac ghouls.
The US Supreme Court dismissed the attack on JnD due to lack of
evidence.
The only concrete lead the CIA had was a shovel with mHz
engraved in the handle.
The corpse transporation vehicle, the Megga-Hearse, is safely
tucked away from authorities in the JnD warehouse.
AcidJack JizzNDitch, when your legs just cant handle that long
walk to the toilet
** who flushes condoms, anyhow? just jizz, and ditch.
mESSIAH JizzNDitch NEGRO, for those meat packin black boys,
this condom stretches up to 2 square miles
mESSIAH JizzNDitch NUTSAQ PROTECTION tm for when its
hotnheavy, and your balls are slapping agains that pussy, NUTSAQ
Protection will give your nuts a steel and lead coating, lead incase
of pending nuclear strike just to be safe
** OUR COMPETITORS BOW DOWN:
dy1 Trojan CEO John Corian is quoted as saying When our stock
began to plummet, I realized our production team had drastically
underestimated the ability of a jizzed-in condom to be thrown away
casually. End quote.
** IN RECENT NEWS:
dy451 Messiah - apparently a JizzNDitch TOO THICK version
was produced for individuals who wish to endure painful
intercourse with Dianas corpse.
SAUCE00
19970928
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