Elvis / Making Sausages / Backyard by Quip / Dead Soul / H
Elvis / Making Sausages / Backyard by Quip / Dead Soul / H
Mistfunk 1997 - Quip - Happyfish - Dead Soul - and Cthulu -
The further adventures of Warpus and Hennifer, in
The king is dead, long live the king or Oh man, these stains are NEVER
coming out of this toque. for Blender 37 elvis/making sausages/backyard.
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Elvis Presley was the host. He had spent months organizing for this event, and
had done a flawless job at that.
There was a knock at the door. He quickly placed his apron on the
counter in the kitchen, and answered it. Standing before him were John F.
Kennedy, Jim Morrison, Jimmy Hoffa, and Leonardo da Vinci. He invited them
in, offered them a seat, and brought them some punch and cocktail weiners.
He then went out to the backyard to fire up the barbecue. He had the
usual sausages, but since Jimmy Hoffa was a vegetarian, he had to cook some
tofu as well.
Meanwhile, Warpus was at Hennifers house, discussing with him the
most vile party-crashing-plot EVER! After two hours, three cases of tequila,
and three trips to the bathroom by Warpus after eating the worms, they came
up with the plan of the century!
They skateboarded over to Graceland, hid in the bush, and scouted the
place out. They then ran around the house on the side opposite of the party
and found the backyard.
After putting the sausages on the fire, Elvis went back inside to
accompany the guests, with corny jokes, and stories of things that didnt even
At the same time, Warpus and Hennifer were creeping through the back-
yard, with a case of tequila Warpus sure loves his tequila!, and 25 caps
of amphetamines. They found the barbecue, opened it up, and dumped the
the contents of the capsules on top of the sausages. They then closed it, ran
around the same side of the house, and snuck into an open window. While Elvis
was in his living room annoying the guests, they found their way into the
kitchen, and dumped the tequila in the punch.
After about 20 more minutes, the party migrated outside to have
sausages and punch muahah!@. After they were done eating, Elvis and his
band took the stage, and announced that they were going to perform their smash
hit, Jailhouse Rock. They tuned up, and began to play. The song started off
normally, but just as they hit the chorus, the amphetamines began to kick in.
They then blasted into an aggressive punk rock version of the song. Warpus and
Hennifer jumped out of the bush which they returned to after the prank, and
started moshing with Leonardo. After practically flattening him on the ground
they started to throw chairs and tables around, eventually hitting Jimmy
Hoffa in the head, and knocking him unconscious thats okay, he was already
dead anyways.
When Jimmy Hoffa hit the ground, his gun fell out of his pocket, and
accidentally shot Elvis television set. Hennifer and Warpus looked up at
Elvis, and he just shrugged and continued thrashing away at his acoustic
Hennifer and Warpus then proceeded to jump onto the stage and stage
dive from the speaker stands into the punch bowl. On Warpus third dive, he
accidentally stepped on Elvis blue suede shoe. The band suddenly stopped, and
Elvis said, I dont remember inviting anybody with a TOQUE!... wait a
second.. youre not dead.. YET!
Elvis ripped off his mask, revealing the maggot covered cadaver which
lay beneath. They then realized that the sausages were not in fact sausages,
but were brains wrapped in human flesh!!
Considering Warpus and Hennifer were suffering from the effects of the
tequila that they had before the party, the situation began to take a very
surreal turn. They quickly ran for the garage and while Hennifer fended off
the unholy legion of the hungry dead, Warpus went for the chainsaw and nail-
gun and sprayed them from the roof. Soon there wasnt anything left but
zombie soup extra chunky.
Hennifer rubbed his nose twice, looked at his watch and said, Shit!
I gotta go meet Superchick!.
Then, Warpus said, Hey yeah, and I can go home and not release the
latest Blender pack!.
They gave each other the secret Lazarus handshake, at a party well
crashed, and left the scene.
No not the art scene you dumbass.
Story by Quip, with coaching from Cthulu
..oh since my sausage left me...
images: X1 X2
data: JSON


  • title
  • Elvis / Making Sausages / Backyard
  • author
  • Quip / Dead Soul / H
  • group
  • mISTFUNK 1997
  • date
  • 1997-08- 6
  • comments
  • datatype
  • character
  • filetype
  • ansi
  • filetype info
  • width: 80
    height: 25
    icecolors: no
    letter spacing: not specified
    legacy aspect: not specified

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