- "it came to pass that seclusion became his science" - the boy was now a teenager, coming into his manhood.. and a pathetic excuse for a teenager he was.. (like that of his fellow students) randomly committing petty crimes.. the cigarettes became his sense of adventure.. and .h.f. became his feeling of fitting in.. (being cool.. down with the homies) the thievery filling him with a foreboding emotion of dread (he was sinking down into the decay of the criminal) - the boy was something he couldn't understand.. should he be awed and astounded? or just be hateful and ignorant? he spouted his macabre shit, so proud and boisterously.. (so boastfully..) leading him on, goading him into slavery.. waxing eloquence, defiling all preconceived beliefs.. with his unholy altar of blasphemy.. his meaty hand flowing gracefully.. the ink creating worlds of wonder upon the white paper.. ("he liked to spin up whole worlds..") ("because a person couldn't fit as easily through a page, see?") his abrasive style of everything hit hard.. slipping easily through cracks in the weak foundation.. and the boy undeniably & inevitably tested his luck.. being like the man he worshipped, who's eye he was always under.. who's mind he was linked to with stout chains.. under the banner of friendship.. (but of course it was a slavery.. by free will or force?) and the boy, although self-assured and confident.. was the same as each of us in turn.. his intelligence far superior than the rest of us meager fucks.. and just as surely as words erupted in frustration.. and a thousand other emotions.. friend and friend, master and slave, parted ways.. so the naïve boy could travel his own way.. (which eventually would meet up with the man once again..) "there's no way to recall what it was that you had said to me like I care at all." - the mystical and weary road to spiritualism was futile.. (oh, how the pagan polytheism was tiring) and in his "love" for everything, he encountered someone.. someone who he used as an object of escape.. like a drug.. a drug you cannot quit sniffing and snorting.. an object he used as an object for his suffering.. as he erected an altar and placed her upon it.. and just as surely as he loved her with all of his penis.. she used her infidelity to drag him down the road of mud.. teasing his emotions and hormones with her flirting, flitting body.. (a month, a month, his kingdom for a month..) (a week, - a week, -) (positive, negative, positive, negative, negative, negative) as the world crumbled indefinetely around him.. all innocence, all naïvity, all, it, all, everything.. everything sacrificed to the god of misanthropy all he owned thrown away to be replaced by the spirit of nihilism (everything's gone in this world of shit) - the only poison he'd ever devoured passionately and willingly had all dried up, been tied up, was dead to the world as the homies had been too many in number one dreadful day.. chains like serpents, waiting to strike.. baseball bats like their phallic perversions.. the testosterone running through them.. not unlike to the blood that flowed steadily down the pavement from his head.. the knives, newly sharpened, like the impaling spears of medieval ages.. - he thought he was invincible, like he could handle anything.. (that came his way, of course..) (he wasn't the instigator) - and the chisel ground away, each chip coming in rapid succesion.. to the preceding one.. until the letters .C.R. were engraved in the black marble.. (the blackest of black..) - and the boy shakes his dumbfounded head to clear it.. his trembling legs tighten, muscles clenching together.. his hands resting on the table top, to lift himself.. as he reaches into his tattered pocket.. fingers clasping the ammount of money for the bill.. and throws it onto the table, as the coins spin.. "we all look so perfect, as we all fall down" - "standing above the crowd he had a voice that was strong and loud we'll miss him ranting and pointing his finger at everything but his heart we'll miss him." -SAUCE00Seclusion was his Science Eterna Scrollz 199812271