the edge - volume 4, issue 4 by elle mcphearsome
the edge - volume 4, issue 4 by elle mcphearsome
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: :: t
he edge is a propaganda vehicle for the blade nation
welcome to our revolution
the edge -- the blade informational textfile - v
olume 4 / issue 4
: contents ::
the edge - volume 4 / issue 4
the blade nation - june 19
97
our affiliates - jun
e 1997
: gj hell isnt a place. its a stat
e of mind. ive been there. :
im the worlds biggest asshole.
W hy are you such an asshole? I get this
question alot. Why is the world
filled with assholes? Not a day goes by that I dont l
oathe the whole of
human existance. Oh well, thats not much of an opener
for the edge. Welcome
to the 40th month of pure monotony. Thats right, the
40th Blade Epic. Wewp.
So anyway. This months pack is pretty nice. Im pleas
ed to the highest state
of pleasure I can get out of this shit anymore. So I t
hink you will be, too.
Its basically the same thing weve done ev
ery month for 3 and a half
years. Its art, we made it, we show it to you, you do
nt acknowledge its
existance, and we move on to next month. We dont do i
t for you. We do it
for ourselves. Art is about expression, not impression
. Were not out to
make the ansi doodleboys worship us, were out to exp
ress ourselves in a
way that makes us happy. So if you like to think other
wise, do us all a
favor and die. Save the planet, kill yourself.
if you come to battle, bring a shotgun.
Y ou wanna antagonize me? Antagonize m
e, motherfucker. Get in the ring
motherfucker, and Ill kick your bitchy little ass...
punk.
speak to me.
W anna contact someone within our feeb
le little group of world
dominators so you can grovel at their feet and beg for
them to draw you
something for your one-day-and-i-come-down bbs? Need s
omething done for
your this is too hard i dont want to do anymore work
webpage? How about
a lit for your holier than thou, look at me i can spe
w my angst zine?
I bet youd even like an ascii for your full of zero
day warez and 3 day
kiddie porn ftp site, eh? Well, heres your chance to
ask politely and offer
us a lot of money. Weve setup division coordi
nator email addresses. Wewp.
ansi@blade.org - napalm death
ascii@blade.org - exar kun
vga@blade.org - ravaged wanderer
music@blade.org - grymmjack
lit@blade.org - cappacino
two turntables, a microphone, and some pure ooncea
liciousness.
L emme guess. Youre the type that sit
s around in your house all day,
wearing nothing but knee high socks and penny loafers,
listening to your
classical music and sipping a strawberry daquari, righ
t? No? Hot diggity
damn! THEN IVE GOT SOMETHING FOR YOU.
Thats right folks, our glorious music department h
as done it again.
The Revelation is upon us, and the 3rd coming of the d
eities has arrived.
Entropic Rhythm is the third and latest Revelation M
usic Disk, and its
a fucking awesome display of pure musical prowess, if
I do say so myself.
Featuring new music from some of the old gods like Dea
d Soul, Grymmjack,
and Paladin, not to mention some new beats from our la
test deity, Tonto.
This disk is worth the under-a-meg download for its 3
5 minutes of pure
musical goodness. Pick up REV03.ZIP wherever good musi
c is.. uhm..
downloaded.
mindcrime i need a title for the new members art
icle.
oxi new arrivals.
mindcrime youre pretty original.
W ull, helloo there, yuk yuk. Iz Bill
y Bob Budd, and this is my brother
liverlips and my other brother asshead. Wez like ta t
ell yaz a story
bout ours huntin trip that wez had last week. Wez
went out wit some
pATOOYEE gunz, and wez brought uhselves back sum o
dat fresh meat.
It was a good nice sunny type of one of them day thang
s, and wez was just
gettin out dah truck, when my brother, liverlips, spo
tz one o dem fuckin
spotted ansi ducks. this thing was all a flappin it
z a wings and wus
tryna get away, so we dun fuckin shot the bitch. we
assimilated that there
ansi duck into our cult. is name was Magnatop
So anyways, we trecked on out inta dah woods and we
z came across
ourselves anotha of them spotted ansi duck nests. we
ambushed dat dere
nest. took dem ducks by supreez, we did. managed to ta
g ourselves anudder
one. named him Internal Stalker because he w
as all hidin in dat dere nest.
Den asshead stopped and cocked one of them position
s with his head like
he wus a hearin sumptin. so we all stopped ta take a
listen, and we hurd
ourselves one of dem dere whistlin spider monkeys. da
t bitch was all
whistlin a jazz tune and shit, so he wusnt hard to n
o find. we caught him
tryna eat out one dem Taco Bell wrappers some udder h
unter left behind. we
shot his bitch ass cold and named him Tonto,
cuz liverlips had an uncle
named dat. dat uncle wus also his sister, insdently.
Dats when it happened. wez got ambushed by a whol
e flock of them
african writing sloths. they was hittin us wit dere p
encils and shit. it
hurt, so we started blastin away at dem and shit. i a
ssdently his liverlips
in da ear and his head blew right off. nuttin big, he
usely lose at least
one guy evry trip. but we caught ourselfs four
o dem fuckin writin
sloths. we got real fond of namin da shit we caught,
so we named em all.
dey was Chlorine, Pyschosis,
Morose1, and The Crowe.
We wuz just about to call it a day, seein as we du
n killed off liverlips
and all. so we wuz hedin back to dah truck when we sa
w two different kindsa
birds all goin at it like dey was catz in heat and sh
it. one uh dem wus one
uh dem high resolution pecking ostriches, and duh udde
r was some program
dove or some shit. i dunno, but dats what asshead dun
told me. we caught
boat dem fuckers, named da peckin guy Black Haze
l and duh progam dove Myn.
Dat was pretty much dah end of our trip. when we du
n got back home, we
foun out dat our good friend Kuma had come
on back to dah farm. we lyked
him a bunch, so it was nice to a see im gin.
Well, dats our story. dat was one helladay.
old man einstein on top of his house.
I n members promotions and demotions t
his month, Grey Hawk got a
gurlfriend. Doesnt sound like that makes much sense?
HAH! He was demoted
due to extreme lack of time and care for the nation. H
es not an alumni.
Taking advantage of Greys unfortunate ac
cident is Grymmjack, who gets
promoted to Senior Staff and remains completely loyal
and deticated to the
Blade Nation despite his deep love for his girly girl,
Sara. That also makes
her a first lady of the Blade Nation, although shel
l probably never know
it. Congrats to Grymmy on a promotion a long time com
ing.
its your choice. peace or annihilation.
L emme tell you a little story about t
his guy who was so full of angst
that he went around all day insulting people and coppi
ng a completely
unjustified ego. He would put people down just to make
himself feel all
big, but little did he know that it was just making hi
m the most hated
person in the whole land.
One day, a piano fell on him from a 2nd story windo
w. He didnt die
instantly. Instead, he writhed around in pain
spreading the blood from his
dismembered stumps all over the sidewalk. His body wen
t into shock, but
forgot how to shut itself off and he just lied there i
n excrutiating pain
until he finally bled to death six hours later. Nobody
helped him out
because he was an asshole his entire life.
Its called karma, man. What you dish out eventuall
y comes back to fuck
you upside the head. Whether you believe it or not, yo
ull end up hating
it.
its your choice. Peace or annihilation. Th
e meek will inherit the earth.
2K is coming.
i can feel the universe functioning.
T hings acquired by the blade nation i
n June, 1997:
as taken from an actual irc log of things people a
cquired.
gj gravis the entire company
oxi live the band
oxi cias ascii dept. we threw it away cause it s
ucked.
gj spaceboy and his dog fucko
phaelinx my moms 8-track collection.
gj my girlfriends turntable
phaelinx belials cousin, michelle.
oxi bills pants
phaelinx death metal yes, the entire genre.
phaelinx the production rights to Kevin Smiths n
ext film.
gj the word koombyah
gj the puck shot off the roof in clerks
phaelinx Nikki Cox the girl from Unhappily Ever
After
gj those dudes on sesame street that honk their n
oses to talk.
oxi phaelinx: the one with big tities?
phaelinx hell, might as well steal The Count for
that matter! :
oxi the start button on your toolbar
gj 4 this is my mcdonalds pins
phaelinx 1 netsplit
gj a poker table with 3 legs.
phaelinx 2 netsplits.
phaelinx 3, 3 netsplits..
oxi milla jovovich - the fifth element chix0r
editors note: the bright orange haired version.
oxi natasha henstridges breast implants
editors note: i prefer to think of them as real.
phaelinx 2 full sets of ctrl, alt, delete.
gj the letter k
phaelinx a norweigan dominatrix.
gj 2 empty canon bubble jet ink cartridges
phaelinx the lake forest satanic bunny commandoes
gj lord jazzs virginity personally taken by gj
oxi 15 million acres of rainforests in brazil
gj my dads shop vac
oxi the scroll lock key
phaelinx the vorpal gates to hell seized by trob
riand and phaelinx.
gj 3 cans of fart spray
oxi each and every species of monkeys living in n
orth america
phaelinx 1 tampon.
oxi that fat black guy who was a hax0r in mission
: impossible
gj knocturnals desire to continue drawing ansi.
gj seven fishing lures from bob villas tackle box
phaelinx the gimp. from Pulp Fiction.
gj a jimmy-the-super-fly-snooka flying turnbuckle
headbut
oxi that guy from jerry maquire.. bubba goodings
junior
phaelinx ice cubes afro
gj rosie odonells coffee mug
gj a spork from taco bell the one that comes wit
h pintos n cheese
oxi rosanne barrs tattooed buttcheeck
phaelinx jenna jameson world renowned porn star.
gj oxi - thats disgusting
turn another turn.
T hats it, folks. Another month in th
e long history of our ever so
humble group. Id like to put out a call to anyone who
actually made it
this far. Id love to hear from you guys. Feedback is
the one thing we dont
get much of with this group. Really, if youve got any
thing to say, good or
bad, send us an email, find us on irc, yell over the c
anyon walls. Whatever,
just tell us what you think of our existance, our work
, our crazy ways, our
web page, our angst, our music.. Whatever. It would ma
ke an old group happy,
and I know everyone on earth is just out to make other
people happy.
/me snickers.
music we listened to while compiling this epic...
orbital, the self titled debut album from orbital
hear in the now frontier, queensryche
empire, queensryche
orbital, the self titled second album from orbita
l
the box, full length 28 minute song of eliteness,
by orbital
Bat Out of Hell, meatloaf
orblivion, the orb
the orbs adventures beyond the ultraworld, the o
rb
the saint, original motion picture soundtrack
wither, blister, burn and peel, stabbing westward
diversions, orbital
movies we saw this month, but not around pack time,
so the pack wasnt
delayed because of them...
the lost world: jurassic park.
movies were going to see tomarrow, one day after t
he pack...
conair
k2!
the edge :: number 40!
ansi by k2! of blade
leader of the revolution:
AI-L-- mindcrime ....................
....................... mci@blade.org
senior staff:
IL belial .......................
.................... marc@netlabs.net
L edicius ....................
..................... edi@cybercomm.net
AM grymmjack ....................
...................... grymmy@123.net
coordinators:
A napalm death ...............
.......................... nd@blade.org
L cappacino ....................
............... cbowers@superlink.net
C dark knight ..................
.................... darky@execpc.com
I exar-kun .....................
............... koondog@ix.netcom.com
V ravaged wanderer..............
..................... rw@shocking.com
members:
V black hazel ................
V charr ......................
..................... charr@matches.com
L chlorine ...................
M dead soul ....................
FTP dimes ...........................
............ sdiamond@skidmore.edu
A elusive vision ...............
................ elusvisn@pacbell.net
A internal stalker .....
I julian .....................
........................ julian@itw.com
A kiwi ....................
V kno-3 ......................
................. brunning@skidmore.edu
A knocturnal ...................
.................. knocky77o@juno.com
AIR kuma .......................
L q ............................
....................... hu.86@osu.edu
V liquid blue ..................
............. blue@transmission23.com
AI lucifer ......................
................ lucifer@injersey.com
L luke skywalker ...............
................... lscodine@juno.com
A magnatop ...................
I mel farr suppastar ...........
L morose1 ....................
C myn ........................
I oxidizer .....................
....................... oxi@post1.com
L phaelinx ...................
..................... plinx@pacbell.com
M paladin ......................
A pandora ......................
................. bguill1@gl.umbc.edu
L psychosis ..................
A riddler ....................
.............. survey2000@earthlink.net
M sensei .......................
............... rformido@skidmore.edu
V sodom ........................
.................. lance2@themall.net
I spoonz .....................
L string .......................
................ string@earthlink.net
L the crowe ..................
C the mage .....................
M tonto ......................
..................... tonto@inetnow.net
I torgo ...................
...................... torgo@geocities.com
toth .........................
L tron powerhouse ............
...................... tronepic@tir.com
M trobriand ..................
I zempf ........................
.................... zempf@modex.com
alumni:
counterpoint .....................................
darkman ..........................................
errant angel .....................................
facsimile ........................................
flux .............................................
grey hawk ......................................
.......... grey@infi-pos.com
soul seeker ......................................
.... soulman@cybercomm.net
tourian ..........................................
. tourian@angel.heaven.god
! - several people have been deleted from this l
ist due to inactivity.
this does not necassarily constitute r
emoval from the group.
affiliated outposts
alderaan
908 mindcrime
: galactic temple
!abraxas 818
mHz
: north american
shrine
apocalypse 201
napalm :
eastern shrine
harvest moon 2
16 quran :
central shrine
free coke 514
the night angel :
canadian shrine
prevail +46
rex :
swedish shrine
organized kaos +61
krisis
: australian shrine
the rebel base 718
luke skywalker :
distribution outpost
internet email mike@exit109.c
om
world wide web http://
www.blade.org
file transfer temporarily do
wn
snail mail blade producti
ons
p.o. box 213
rumson, nj 07760
end of file mikey frooty. mhz is
god.