Once, there was a guy named Superman..
He was a perfect guy with an inch thick tan..
He was adored by the ladies
and envyed by men..
If in the olympics hed be a straight up 10..
But the man with strength, agility and speed..
Got tired of doing every good deed..
.. a bank is robbed, a child is shot
and having fun, Superman is not.
He wastes his life away, saving folks..
When he could be at the bar tellin jokes.
But all his life, its plain to see
He will be saving people like you and me..
But, one dark day he said to himself,
All those people can go to hell
He had a different gleam in his eye..
It was black and brown, the color of rye..
Now you might have thought he would never crack
But this man Superman will never come back..
The story that follows is complex and odd
and I got my info from a man named Todd.
Todd said, I know where dis man be.
I saw em flyin ova da Coral sea
Im happy to of helped ya
That man be in Australia!
So I said to myself I would save the world from this mania..
Id take a boat to tasmania..
So I got in my row boat and started to row
Took me 2 years, but I saved a whole lotta dough..
When I finally got there I asked around
Does anyone know superman in this town??
They all just looked and laughed..
obviously I looked like an ass..
But Im American I said to myself
and trotted upward with the speed of a stealth..
I was in Tasmania, I think that is why
Noone knew him and noone said hi..
So Im headed towards Australia with hopeful ambitions
Soon to find out I am on a big mission...
So I finally crossed the channel to get to Australia
and commenced my searched for the caped crusader..
After questioning the people
and eatin some lunch,
I wound up in an alley gettin punched..
Now, I hoped that this wasnt what it seemed..
But it was supermans possie beating up on me..
They threw me in a cab and drove me off..
To a place where I saw superman playing golf..
As i was dragged out of the car, to my surprise
I saw superman and his demise..
Superman said, What are you doing boy..
Tryin to take away my joy?
His eyes were dark, hateful, and mean
While he was standing on the putting green..
It turns out the man was practicing for something costly
He was in a mini-golf league in southern Aussie!
He said, Boy why did you follow me?
I said, There is hell in the CITY!
He laughed, I dont care I hate em all..
Ive got my eyes on the trophy and the free gold golf ball.
with the thought of that gold ball
it is ten feet wide
I decided to stay and stand up tall
and swallow my pride
I told him id stay and manage his career..
as long as I got paid, and got free beer..
- The moral of this story is, never take a row boat to au
stralia.., it does a number on your hiney.. -
- vap0r poem klumzee floating head