The Purple Tentacle Presents Another Great Text File From..
N A R C H I S T S A N O N Y M O U S
Welcome all u evil-doers to another text from Anarchists Anonymous. This one
is entitled Anarchy-Related things to do in a Park. This is very useful if
one day yer bored and you want to go piss people off. The text has been divided
into two parts: Day Time Phun, and Night Time Phun. This was necessary because
some of the ideas are not the brightest friggin thing to in the broad daylight.
Or some of the things in the daytime dont work in the night. L8r...
DAYTiME PHUN
1. Simply getting a gang of people, going to a park where little kids are play-
ing, and hogging all the equipment is a real piss-off, to both the kids and
the supervising parents. Maybe if yer lucky, one of the parents will
complain to you and yer gang. Then you can have fun and insult them during
your fight with them. Eventually, you will chase all the parents away.
2. During yer stay at the park with the kids and parents, you can use immense
quantities of abusive language. In other words, swear until your tongue
falls off. But dont direct it at the kids, unless absolutely necessary,
because one of the parents will probably say something like Dont talk
to my son/daughter that way! and ask for yer address. Leave the scene with
out giving NE namez. If you are forced to, use some lamers name.
3. If there are kids around but no parents, start a fight but dont throw the
first punch. That way, if the kids goes off and cries to his mommy, you can
say he/she threw the first one. This is enjoyable and fool-proof, and you
get to see the kid get in trouble by his parents. If you want, you can start
laughing at him while he is promptly verbally bashed by the old crone.
4. Setting small fires with newspapers in the parks is often really cool. Just
set fire to it, and walk away. The people hanging around will probably spaz
and try to put it out in many different and often creative wayz, such as
dipping a kid in sand and drowning the flame, or getting the fattest bitch
there and crushing the entire park. :
5. If you want to enhance idea numero 4, you can line a trail of papers all
over the park--around the park, through the sand, down the slide, etc.
Coat the papers in gasoline, and lite one end. Almost instantly the papers
will go up and the park will be ablaze, neatly and in a line of course. If
there is a forest or something nearby, hide in it and make sure you can see
the park clearly, so you can also see the havoc displayed. Firemen, police,
worried neighbours, and maybe even an ambulance!
6. You could just write generally disgusting or funny pictures and/or messages
on the wood or slide. Influence the kids that go there to become Anarchists
because kids are vulnerable to such ideas at young ages. Remember, the more
the merrier!
7. Burn large holes in the top and bottom of slide, so the kids get to the
bottom of the slide a lot quicker. Also you could burn neat designs into the
slide, such as a pentegram, an Anarchy Symbol, or the ever famous phrase:
PIGS CAN KISS MY ASS!
8. Cut the chains on the tire-swing, just enough so that the next person who
uses the tire-swing will get a shock from the fall, and a headache from the
chains collasping on their head. This will also force the injured persons
to sue the citys parks and rec department, and then the parks and rec will
spend even more money replacing the damaged material.
9. Hold Satanic meetings and sacrifices in front of all the little ones and the
parents. Decaptation of goats and small calves is especially cool, because
those are two of the most blood-containing animals on the planet. Aim the
fountain o blood at some old bag whos babysitting one of the kids. Dont
forget to sacrifice the naked virgin!
10. Stroll around the park and the city for hours on end in the typical nazi
position, which is: right hand in the air, small fake black moustache, the
arm patch, and the docs with red laces. Also shout Heil Hitler! in perfect
syncronization so it sounds like youre all reminants of the german army
or really screwed up. If your lucky, others will join in.
NiGHT PHUN
1. If you can get a hold of an air wrench, this is definately a great thing to
do. Get a group of friends who are really strong, and take the air wrench to
the park. Now remove the bolts on the side of the slide that attach it to
the wooden frame of the park. You and yer really strong friend would now
proceed to take the slide out of the park, and into a lake somewhere. Dont
forget to write THIS WAS DONE BY and then someone elses name, just to get
them blamed.
2. If yer friends are REALLY REALLY strong, or you can steal or get a pickup
truck, you can also take the actual wood from the frame and put it in the
back of the pickup truck. Also take the slide and the swing, and dump it ALL
in the friggin lake.
3. Burn the park. Simple, yet effective, plus it also attracts many sleepy and
unhappy neighbourhood parents. It also pollutes and attracts many authour-
oties and others. Get out the eggs and whip them from a far distance and be
prepared to hide or run!
4. Using the Air Wrench, if you got one, and yer big friends, you can really
rearrange the park! Just un-wrench all the bits, and place em in a different
position, Such as putting three or four bits o wood at the end of the slide
so the kids have a big pile up because nobody can get through!! Maybe a 2 or
3 deaths or injurys/suffications may occur if nobody notices after a while.
5. If you happen to dislike a few little people or just wanna have plain fun,
grab three or four kids and hide em in the forest until late at night. Your
identity should be hidden-- if the kids get loose they can arrest you. NEway
tie the kids to different poles of the park and leave them there overnite.
Leave maybe a slice of pizza in the middle of the park, that way you
can say you fed them. If you really hate them you should tie them to the
piece of wood that travells horizontally about 10 ft in the air--it should
be the one that holds the swing. Beat em dizzy if ya want.
6. Create the park a really unstable hellhole. Use your air wrench or just
regular old power tools or axe or whatever--just make sure itll cut through
and/or remove the bolts. If you got an air wrench, loosen every single bolt
in the entire park, and then unscrew them even more, so a couple of shakes
and steps will make it dislodge itself from its resting spot and the kids
will very much hurt after a while. If you just have a saw, axe, or power
tool simply cut enormous holes and gaps in everything there. Take the swing
too.
7. Coat the park in a thick layer of tar. This way, by the time somebody sees
the black park, it will be too late. The park will be concrete--completely
ruined. This will cost the local Parks Rec department ALOT to replace,
and it will be a fortune they dont have it you do it to every park in the
city over a period of several days. They will probably go bankrupt, and have
to cause a hell of a situation to get back in business, all because of you
and your friends. That just sounds cool, doesnt it?
Thats all 4 now! I got quite a lot out of this one, compared to what I
thought I would...9500 instead of 6000. Not bad, I think. I think this is our
4th pack, and were still going, so keep reading and keep killing and keep
robbing and keep breaking...well, you get it. L8r.
GReeTZ go out to: Anarchial Artist Konichiwa.
Guile Poor Scot face,hair
Obi Wan Kenobi Nice MISC.TXT
Myxzu K-RAD name!
Cthulu Welcome 2 da Group
And to NEbody else I missed out!